Why Do Narcissists Stare? 5 Reasons Why They Glare 👀

Last updated by Katie M.

Narcissists have a reputation for being amongst the most manipulative people out there, and rightly so! The truth is, these people are so good at the evil things they do because they operate under the radar and use covert methods to exercise their depraved missions. Now, one of the biggest and seemingly most unsuspecting techniques they use to manipulate and control their victims is staring. You're no doubt a little dubious about a stare being an effective tool in the art of manipulation, but it's true, a void and menacing look is one of the most intimidating and unnerving gestures that these folks turn to.


A stare may seem pretty insignificant, after all, we've all had an awkward experience taking the subway, for example, and noticing that a stranger's eyes were fixed on us for longer than a few seconds. Well, narcissists take this gaze to a whole different level and use it as a weapon to control their prey. They say that silence speaks a thousand words, but I actually think an insisting gaze does.

>>> Read; What is hoovering?

5 Reasons why these abusers use the narcissistic stare

Nothing can tear their eyes away...

1) Staring is a form of love bombing

These expert manipulators will attempt to mask their truly menacing intentions behind doe-eyes and affectionate glances, but the truth is, they aren't fooling anyone. They typically turn to the love-bombing tactic early in a relationship, as a way of convincing their prey that they are the perfect partner. Here, they'll shower their future girlfriend with endless compliments, gifts, and looks of lust on a daily basis. Yep, no form of PDA is over the top for these calculating creeps.

2) They use it to make victims feel threatened

Whilst narcissists like to pretend that they are upstanding citizens and amazing partners, the reality couldn't be any different. In fact, these folks are more like sulky petulant children than anything else, except they have a dangerous edge to their personalities, meaning they will do anything to get what they want. Now, in order to back their victims, who by the way will no doubt lack buckets of self-esteem, into a corner, they'll constantly observe them. No matter what their partners do, these abusers will have tabs on them, to the point where privacy becomes an alien-like concept.

3) It's a way for them to analyze your emotional state

Whilst these evil personalities arguably have way more flaws than qualities, we must recognize just how good their observation skills are. Indeed, they have a talent for picking up on things that slide under the radar for most of us, especially where character weaknesses are concerned. Just by observing someone for a matter of minutes, they'll have figured out exactly how to control them and dominate their life! This is terrifying, right?!

>>> Read; What are the weaknesses of a narcissist?

4) They want to assert their control

Nothing a narcissist does is spontaneous and if they want to start a staring contest it's not just for fun, instead, it's to establish a sense of control. With their chilling stares and figuratively cutting looks, they'll want to demonstrate how domineering and strong they are. Plus, they'll use this seemingly innocent gesture as a means to suggest that they'll never back down from any challenge, meaning their partner should never rebel against them.

5) Leering is a form of attention-seeking

Like I said beforehand, these monsters have an immature side to their personalities, meaning when they date someone, they want to monopolize all their attention, pretty much 24/7! Now, by throwing out void stares, they are looking to become the center of their partner's attention and will insist on looking at them until they get it. You've guessed right, they'll never back down or, in this context, look away.

Editor's opinion - Express your discomfort

Narcissist or not, just because someone tries to throw their weight around with you doesn't mean you have to accept everything they attempt to subject you to. Certain gestures make us feel uncomfortable (we don't need to explain why), yet when we feel on edge, we need to muster up the courage to speak out. Whether it be at work, on public transport, or in a bar, if someone is making you feel nervous and out of sorts, don't hesitate to communicate your malaise and thereby take control of the situation.

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!


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"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." 

- Oscar Wilde