When people with narcissistic traits decide they hate something, all hell breaks loose and no one in their perimeter is safe and trust me, I should know because I’ve been there, done that and bought the t-shirt with my ex. My ex was a complete narcissist, so I know firsthand what gets under these vindictive people’s skin and want to alert you to their triggers too.
10 Things that narcissists hate above more than anything else
1) Losing control
Control is a narcissist's best ally, and they need it in order to be able to sink their claws into their victims. From deciding where to go out to eat, to taking the lead in conversations, these personalities will want to be the ones pulling the strings and if people don’t get on board, well that’s just too bad. They feel the need to be the one who decides and feel entitled to take the lead in all circumstances. Negotiation with these folks is literally a distant dream because they will only ever take their opinion into consideration.
2) Feeling looked down on
No one likes to feel disrespected, but narcissists simply just can’t accept the feeling. When they believe that someone has started to lose their admiration for them, things could take a dangerous turn because they’ll do anything to win back that triumphant feeling of being looked up to. After all, these guys need to be told that they are the best looking, the smartest and the most interesting people on the block.
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3) Truly strong people
Now, the thing is, folks with this personality disorder are completely jealous of other people. Be it for their possessions, their success or their abilities; the bottom line is they’ll always be envious of those they believe are truly respected for their authentic selves. It’s important to remember that these people are only put on a facade that they are strong, confident and respectable, yep, they’re only hiding behind a well-constructed mask and really don’t view themselves very highly.
4) Being lectured and challenged on what they claim to know
Now, this point could really make them see red! It’s not uncommon for sufferers to believe their own hype and to convince themselves and others for that matter of fact that they are experts in certain areas. Whether they believe they are completely up-to-date with current affairs, foreign policy or even the history of football, they’ll hate anyone else invading their so-called territory and claiming to know a thing or two. Jealousy also comes into play here and makes them feel threatened and undermined by folks they obviously consider to be inferior to themselves.
5) Being told no
Okay, so imagine the consequences of showing a red rag to a bull, well, a victim finally standing up for themselves would probably produce the same effects. People with narcissistic tendencies hate being told no because they believe themselves to be superior and know better than everyone else, so why would anyone need to go against them and affirm their views?
6) Seeing other people happy
You’ve probably guessed by now, but we’re dealing with inherently unhappy and dissatisfied personalities, who struggle to love themselves. Their battles with their self-image mean they can’t stand being around those that seem secure and happy with their lives and situation.
7) Being confronted with the ugly truth
I’d be lying if I said these guys were the bravest when it comes to facing up to their realities and realizing who they are. In fact, admitting their weaknesses to themselves is something they are equipped to do. After all, feeling bad about themselves goes against their mantra of making themselves look and feel good at all times. Plus, no one really wants to admit that they are manipulative, controlling and dishonest.
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8) When someone else steals the limelight
How dare anyone steal a narcissist’s glory, and if you choose to do so, you’d best be prepared to face their wrath! The truth of the matter is that these personalities can’t stand the idea of anyone in their entourage succeeding or doing better than them. Competition is everything for them, and second place is definitely out of the question.
9) Being unable to manipulate their victims
This is undeniably their biggest source of frustration ever. These personalities don’t exist if they have no one to manipulate and control. Manipulation is their biggest hobby, so when their victims find their voice and decide enough is enough, a feeling of anger and emptiness washes over them.
10) Do narcissists hate being ignored? - Yes, they detest it!
When all eyes aren’t on them, and they aren’t being made to feel special, you can count on drama starting. You must remember that these folks have over inflated egos, which mean they need to command your attention and have you at their beck and call at all hours of the day and night for that matter. When a narcissist is ignored, they may feel a sense of insignificance or rejection. In response, they may exhibit various behaviors to regain the attention and control they desire. This could include seeking attention from other sources, attempting to provoke a reaction, or employing manipulative tactics to regain their perceived superiority.
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What personality type do narcissists hate?
The narcissist is essentially a control freak, meaning these folks love pulling the strings and calling the shots when it comes to deciding things for their victims. Now, if their victim understands their game, and shows himself to be independent, they’ll instantly turn the tables and have the abuser panicking. Indeed, narcissists hate it when limits are imposed by people who appear strong and confident in their decisions. However, people with strong personality types will evidently push the manipulators to undermine their victim's confidence and esteem Furthermore, these manipulative personalities hate anyone capable of standing up to them and saying no. Indeed, the manipulator is always right and claims to have knowledge, power, and dominance. When told no, the manipulator goes crazy at the expense of those around them. These folks must always be right and be able to obtain everything. "No" is thus synonymous with a loss of control, which they do not appreciate.
Do narcissists hate themselves?
The answer is yes, however, these folks will never admit it! People with this personality disorder are shrouded with self-loathing and hate, but are too proud to seek help for these issues. Now, whilst they may appear to be confident and powerful, this image is in fact just a well-put- facade, designed to hide what they perceive as their weaknesses.
Narcissists don’t have the capacity to love themselves, due to their dramatically low self-esteem, which therefore means that they often become trapped in a dangerous spiral of self-hate. A narcissist is essentially jealous of everyone around them, and that’s why they take such pleasure in destroying and tormenting their victims. Now, whilst they appear confident, these folks would all struggle to genuinely find something they loved about themselves. They lack of love they experienced in their childhood develops into a whole life of self-despising as an adult.
Whatever your relationship with a narcissist, it is important to remind yourself that they only put out into the world what they want other people to see. Indeed, they hide their flaws behind carefully constructed disguises and are never really prepared to address the root of their problems.
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What words do narcissists hate?
People suffering from narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) believe they are superior to others. In short, they have an exaggerated sense of self-importance, plus they are controlling, selfish, and manipulative. However, despite their brashness, there are words and phrases that really get under their skin, here are 5 examples:
1. The word ‘no’
By saying no assertively and calmly, the narcissist, who is already used to always hearing your yes, will be surprised and may spiral.
2. ‘I'm not afraid of you’
One of the ways the narcissist finds to dominate and manipulate others is through fear and threats. Initially, they seek to observe the other person's weaknesses to use them to their advantage in the future, but setting this precedent will change course.
3. The world doesn't revolve around you
If you want to put an end to this abusive behavior, uttering this phrase can be a good way to start. Especially if it's accompanied by a change of attitude. You should stop giving priority to the narcissist's wishes and look more to your own needs.
4. Don't pressure me
They're very insistent, and become heavy-handed. Then, if you don't want to make a decision purely out of pressure and risk regretting it later, you need to be clear and direct.
5. Don't compare me
One of the strategies a narcissist uses to dominate someone is to make constant comparisons with others, highlighting what that person doesn't have.
What angers a narcissist the most?
Narcissists turn every emotion into anger or charm. They channel all their emotions into tools of manipulation. But they are human too. And in my experience, their depression, which I associate most with sadness, is a very deep thing that they fear, because to be sad is to be weak, and to show sadness is to show weakness, but anger is seen differently in society. It's a very deep-seated thing that they fear because to be sad is to be weak and to show sadness is to show weakness, but anger is seen differently in society, especially for men, so it's acceptable and as a bonus, it makes people afraid, which makes them easier to manipulate or keep away from.
So why do they fight and scream? Because nothing scares a narcissist more than uncontrollable feelings and emotions. This is their Kryptonite. This is what they bury as deep as possible. All the abuse they suffered as a child and anything they felt as an adult that may be considered weak or that they consider "disrespectful" that was not expressed right away is buried here. Have you ever noticed that a narcissist would elicit disrespect and respect in all passionate interactions, including many basic interactions? No disrespect in the case of themselves towards others, but how are they or were they ignored? This is what they are looking for in their image. Respect. But, like love, they have no real idea of what it really means or implies.
Narcissists can be particularly sensitive to certain situations or behaviors that threaten their ego or challenge their perception of superiority. Here are a few examples of what can upset a narcissist:
- Criticism or questioning of their competence or expertise: Narcissists have high self-esteem and often consider themselves superior to others. Any comment or criticism that questions their competence or expertise can be perceived as an attack on their self-esteem.
- Non-recognition or lack of admiration: These devious personalities have a strong need to be admired and valued. When they don't receive the attention or admiration they feel they deserve, they can become upset and frustrated.
- Being ignored or relegated to the background: They tend to seek attention and want to be the center of attention. When ignored or sidelined, they may react with anger or feel threatened in their need to be perceived as important.
- Being confronted with their mistakes or weaknesses: These personalities often find it hard to accept their own mistakes or weaknesses. When confronted with imperfections or failures, they may react with anger, denial or minimization.
- Being challenged or contradicted: Narcissistic people have a tendency to want to exert control and be in power in relationships. When challenged or contradicted, they may react aggressively or hostilely to maintain their sense of superiority.
What happens when a narcissist knows you hate them?
When a narcissist figures out that you hate and resent them, they step their behavior up and become even more diabolical. Narcissists are very self-aware and always determine what other people, especially their victims, think of them. Yet, this only spurs them on and encourages them to sink their claws into their prey even more. When they realize that they are disliked, they will become even more manipulative and controlling. They will create rumors about their victims and attempt to flip the tables and make themselves look like the person being manipulated. These controlling personalities don’t exactly react well to being disliked, and that’s mainly because they have a facade to keep up with others.
Editor’s opinion: Stand strong and don’t back down
People with narcissistic personalities will do anything to remain in control and get what they want, so don’t be drawn into their little games when they claim that you’ve done something to hurt their feelings. There are many things that get to us, but don’t let yourself be tricked into feeling guilty
about things that have allegedly upset them because this will be a catalyst to gaining your sympathy vote.
🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!
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