What Does A Narcissist Hate? - 10 Things They Really Can’t Stand

Last updated by Katie M.

Narcissists are experts in the field of duping and manipulating their victims, yes, that’s right they are true chameleons, which explains why many of them often go undetected. Their behavior is definitely dangerous and means we definitely need to figure out what makes them tick and in this particular case, what they hate. Understanding what these entitled personalities dislike is one of the keys to best exposing them and freeing their victims from their grip. Now, we all get angry for one reason or another, but people with this personality disorder have different triggers related to the things they despise.

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When people with narcissistic traits decide they hate something, all hell breaks loose and no one in their perimeter is safe and trust me, I should know because I’ve been there, done that and bought the t-shirt with my ex. My ex was a complete narcissist so I know firsthand what gets under these vindictive people’s skin and want to alert you to their triggers too.

10 Things that narcissists hate above more than anything else

1) Losing control

Control is a narcissists best ally and they need it in order to be able to sink their claws into their victims. From deciding where to go out to eat, to taking the lead in conversations, these personalities will want to be the ones pulling the strings and if people don’t get on board, well that’s just too bad. They feel the need to be the one who decides and feel entitled to take the lead in all circumstances. Negotiation with these folks is literally a distant dream because they will only ever take their opinion into consideration.

2) Feeling looked down on

No one likes to feel disrespected, but narcissists simply just can’t accept the feeling. When they believe that someone has started to lose their admiration for them, things could take a dangerous turn because they’ll do anything to win back that triumphant feeling of being looked up to. After all, these guys need to be told that they are the best looking, the smartest and the most interesting people on the block.

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3) Truly strong people

Now, the thing is, folks with this personality disorder are completely jealous of other people. Be it for their possessions, their success or their abilities; the bottom line is they’ll always be envious of those they believe are truly respected for their authentic selves. It’s important to remember that these people are only put on a facade that they are strong, confident and respectable, yep, they’re only hiding behind a well-constructed mask and really don’t view themselves very highly.

4) Being lectured and challenged on what they claim to know

Now, this point could really make them see red! It’s not uncommon for sufferers to believe their own hype and to convince themselves and others for that matter of fact that they are experts in certain areas. Whether they believe they are completely up to date with current affairs, foreign policy or even the history of football, they’ll hate anyone else invading their so-called territory and claiming to know a thing or two. Jealousy also comes into play here and makes them feel threatened and undermined by folks they obviously consider to be inferior to themselves.

5) Being told no

Okay, so imagine the consequences of showing a red rag to a bull, well, a victim finally standing up for themselves would probably produce the same effects. People with narcissistic tendencies hate being told no because they believe themselves to be superior and know better than everyone else, so why would anyone need to go against them and affirm their views?

6) Seeing other people happy

You’ve probably guessed by now, but we’re dealing with inherently unhappy and dissatisfied personalities, who struggle to love themselves. Their battles with their self-image mean they can’t stand being around those that seem secure and happy with their lives and situation.

7) Being confronted with the ugly truth

I’d be lying if I said these guys were the bravest when it comes to facing up to their realities and realizing who they are. In fact, admitting their weaknesses to themselves is something they are equipped to do. After all, feeling bad about themselves goes against their mantra of making themselves look and feel good at all times. Plus, no one really wants to admit that they are manipulative, controlling and dishonest.

>>> Read up on why I always make the wrong decisions

8) When someone else steals the limelight

How dare anyone steal a narcissist’s glory and if you choose to do so, you’d best be prepared to face their wrath! The truth of the matter is that these personalities can’t stand the idea of anyone in their entourage succeeding or doing better than them. Competition is everything for them and second place is definitely out of the question.

9) Being unable to manipulate their victims

This is undeniably their biggest source of frustration ever. These personalities don’t exist if they have no one to manipulate and control. Manipulation is their biggest hobby, so when their victims find their voice and decide enough is enough, a feeling of anger and emptiness washes over them.

10) Being ignored

When all eyes aren’t on them and they aren’t being made to feel special, you can count on drama starting. You must remember that these folks have over inflated egos which mean they need to command your attention and have you at their beck and call at all hours of the day and night for that matter.

>>> Am I a narcissist? Take the test here

Editor’s opinion: Stand strong and don’t back down

People with narcissistic personalities will do anything to remain in control and get what they want, so don’t be drawn into their little games when they claim that you’ve done something to hurt their feelings. There are many things that get to us but don’t let yourself be tricked into feeling guilty about things that have allegedly upset them because this will be a catalyst to gaining your sympathy vote.

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Article presented by Katie M.

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Comments

The frustration that comes from cooperation with such people when you have a strong personality(Intj) and a alternate opinion. Lol. Basically if your not agreeing your not listening! Never appreciate your efforts. Somehow has a vague back story with no true attempt to find a solution, because in there head they refuse to suffer the displeasure of feeling wrong. Thanks for the help!

Thank you so much for this! This brings such clarity to what is going on with a co-worker. Very helpful!

My husband is definitely a narcissist..after being together off & on for 20 year he is still exhibiting those personality traits. I just ignore him & I also tell him,, when he acts as such I put my energy back in to myself. I’m so over to the point it doesn’t affect me after I went on a “self love journey” which angers him til this day. Now that I’m stronger he loses every time when he comes for me.. like I mentioned in the beginning I just ignore him fully 😊

Hi I've read a lot on Narcism, however. This is tremendously spot on. In the human spectrum of life how does this happen. We hear the expression "not all are the same" but narcissists are. It behooves me to know how a behavior can manifest and be identical to none related people. If I didn't know any better I'd think U wrote this with my sister in mind. SPOT ON 1000% WOW. Not 1 single thing mentioned is off. Amazing..

This is by far the best written article on narcissism/personality disorders. Excellent.

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