6 Differences Between Being Self-Centered And A Narcissist

Are the definitions of these disorders different?

Yes, according to the dictionary definition, being self-centered is to be preoccupied with oneself or one’s affairs, which we are no doubt all guilty of (I certainly know I am). On the other hand, narcissism is a disorder which definitely includes being selfish, however, it also touches on a lack of empathy, a need for admiration, and an unhealthy obsession with physical appearance.

The word narcissism is often thrown around a little too much and has become a blanket term for many undesirable traits that many of us display. Plus, for the most part, it is also a very misunderstood condition. Although, selfishness and self-centeredness are symptoms of narcissism, they don’t encompass the whole illness. Indeed, this disorder has many facets and can’t simply be reduced to a few toxic behaviors that most of the population display at one moment or another. 

>>> Take this test and discover if you are a toxic person

What are the differences between a narcissistic and self-centered personality?

Here's what makes these tendencies starkly different…

1) Empathy

Narcissists are characterized by their blatant disregard for other people and their feelings. Despite how bad or low other people feel, they’ll never show an ounce of sympathy for them or even attempt to understand their situations. Self-centered people may seem wrapped up in their own lives, however they are able to take a step back from their own little world in order to put themselves into other people’s shoes.

2) Lies and manipulation

Now, lies and manipulation are definitely specialities of narcissists. In effect, these folks use these underlying tactics to keep their victims under their influence. Making people feel powerless and helpless isn’t exactly something selfish people are accustomed to doing, however, they are at times guilty of embellishing their success stories. In short, their lies are more superficial than hurtful.

>>> Learn how to put a stop to emotional blackmail

3) Constant competition

Self-centered people are too insular to acknowledge other people’s triumphs, which is why they fail to analyze their worth and reject the idea of competition with them. On the flip side, narcissistic people are very aware of other people’s qualities, which motivates them to bring them down in the most violent way possible. The truth is, jealousy drives them forward and thereby provides them with a great source of entertainment.

4) Entitlement

The self-centered people out there seem to hide behind an air of false self-confidence, whereas narcissists genuinely believe that they are untouchable and deserve more than anyone else. They truly believe that they are worth more and will therefore never abandon their entitled attitude, despite how penalizing it can be.

5) Intense overreactions

After all, what works better than massive overreactions in order to get people on side? Because narcissists are so cunning, they know exactly what to do to pull on people’s heart strings and drum up their support. Conversely, selfish and self-centered people lack the devious element to their personalities to actually do this.

6) Lack of accountability

The last difference between these two diverging personality types is the accountability factor. On the one hand, narcissists will go above and beyond to deny their responsibility, whereas selfish folks do in fact have the decency to hold their hands up and accept their wrongdoings.

Why are narcissists so selfish?

It's no surprise that narcissists are deeply selfish and self-centered people. In their heads, it's them first, them second and them third. Them, always and still them everywhere and all the time. A true narcissist, is selfish in their feelings because they have none that are particularly, and only really enjoy crushing their victims.

For a true narcissist, other people are simply just objects which they use to:

• to constitute their court of admirers
• to realize their desires and dreams
• to be the receptacle of their psychic rejects, defects, and shortfalls which allow them to flee responsibility.

How do you know if you’re self-centered?

Detecting a self-centered person isn’t always an easy thing to do, however, certain signs cannot remain hidden for too long. Here are 5 things that will eventually give a self-centered person away.

• An obvious lack of empathy: An egocentric person will not be able to reason or feel beyond her own existence. He or she is enclosed in his or her own bubble, completely sealed off from the rest of the world. Everything he or she does is aimed at his or her own well-being. Social and personal relationships will be very complicated because the egocentric thinks that everyone must act and think like him or her.
• The constant pursuit of success: By nature, egocentrics want to shine wherever they can, even though some of their goals are unattainable.
• Lack of self-esteem: This tendency to always talk about oneself often conceals an emotional malaise. Here, psychologists see egocentricity as an unconscious strategy for protecting oneself from reality, by maintaining a good self-image in the eyes of others.
• Compliment-seeking: An egocentric person thrives on the flattery and admiration of others. They'll do anything to attract the spotlight to themselves. They will also try to control those around them, influencing their opinions, ideas, and actions.
• Manipulation: This is what distinguishes the egoist from the egocentric. While the egoist needs no one to satisfy him or her, the egocentric will always depend on others, since his or her esteem is forged only through their eyes. They'll only be interested in others in exchange for something.

Be sure to check out these articles too;

• How to react to a megalomaniac
• How to control fits of anger
• How to be more self-assertive