How Narcissists Treat Their Exes - 6 Shocking Things They Do

Last updated by Katie M.

Walking away and definitively closing the door on your relationship with a narcissistic ex-partner is one of the most emotionally draining challenges you can face. After all, these manipulative bullies are never willing to just let bygones be bygones, and always want to have the final word after the break-down of a relationship. Besides, when narcissists get dumped, their inner demon raises its ugly head and becomes determined to (metaphorically) destroy their ex-partner.


Now, a narcissist will certainly never win boyfriend or husband of the year, but when their feelings are hurt and their partner has ended things, they crank up the intensity level of their evilness. Their immaturity and need for revenge mean they are incapable of respecting the decision to end things, and will begin to treat their past lovers in an even more demonic way.

Narcissists treat their exes horribly - Here are 6 examples of what they do to their exes post breakup

1) They dip in and out of their lives

Narcissists are anything but predictable, and they love to keep their exes on their toes by regularly ghosting them and popping back up in their lives. At certain points, they’ll bombard their ex-partners with messages telling them how much they miss them, whereas, at others, they’ll give them the silent treatment for weeks on end. The instability they inflict on their partner means they remain in control and are constantly in the driver’s seat by picking and choosing when to communicate.

>>> Discover the reasons ghosters always come back

2) They’ll try to become friends with them

They’ll no doubt claim that they don’t want any drama, and will insist they want to be amicable about things moving forward. By reinforcing the idea that they want to stay friends, they are actively leaving the door open to getting back together whenever please. The truth is, their sense of superiority means they believe that they can restart relationships whenever, regardless of what has happened.

3) They’ll flirt with them

Flirting involves toying with people’s emotions and exciting their curiosity, and it’s a field that self-obsessed narcissists excel in. They love feeling sexy and wanted because it boosts their ego and sense of self-importance. Plus, by flirting with their ex, they’ll reinforce their puppet master role and therefore believe they are the architects of their future.

4) They’ll spread lies about their exes

By moving on to the darker side of a narcissist’s personality, we soon realize that they are extremely bitter exes and will always attempt to seek revenge. Now, they are never even slightly concerned about hurting people’s feelings or remorseful about their actions, no, they are more worried about saving face. Indeed, preserving their reputation is so important to them that they become even more obsessed with their ego and will make up lies in order to do so. Plus, nothing is out of bounds for them, that do anything they deem useful to get back at their exes.

5) They’ll play mind games

Narcissists are well known for playing mind games because they help to reinforce their hold over their current or past victims. They’ll resort to love bombing, self-esteem reduction, and emotional manipulation to keep their ex under the thumb. The truth is, these games send subliminal messages to the victims that they’ll never truly break free and get their lives back. Here, we are dealing with emotional torturers who will stop at nothing to crush people that they believe have betrayed them.

6) They’ll blackmail them

Whether they have compromising text messages or photos of their exes, they’ll use whatever material they have against them, and of course they’ll take pleasure in seeing them squirm. They get their sick kicks from making threats and will use whatever they have to get their past lovers to do exactly what they want, which means breaking the cycle of abuse can be excessively tough.

Do narcissists miss their exes?

This certainly isn’t an easy question to answer because absolutely nothing is straightforward with these bullies. Whilst on paper, narcissists are incapable of loving anyone other than themselves, they struggle with the idea of change, so when someone they previously relied on suddenly disappears, they can feel sad, although they won’t admit it. These slippery snakes need a steady network of people around them to be able to feed into their grandiose ideas and theories. Now, they won’t miss their exes romantically, but they will miss being able to manipulate and toy with them.

Editor’s opinion - Talk about your troubles

If you are still being emotionally toyed with by a bitter ex, then seeking support in the form of friends, a group, or even law enforcement is one of the best ways to ensure your safety. Opening up may be difficult, but it’s an essential step towards safeguarding your mental health.

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy… Let’s do it here and now!


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Article presented by Katie M.

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