When someone hurts us, be it someone we love, or someone we are friends with, the darker side of our human nature kicks in, and means we want to get revenge. Now, when it comes to vicious narcissists who will stop at nothing to make our lives miserable, it’s only natural that we want to get our own back, but it’s not always as simple as that. These slippery characters are expert plotters and know their victims like the backs of their hands, meaning revenge needs to be well thought through in order to have an impact. After unfortunately dating several of these evil specimens, I know what hurts them most, and that’s seeing their victims thrive. The truth is, you don’t need to resort to threats or violence to get even with them, all you need to do is focus on getting yourself back to the original version of yourself.
>>> Discover; Does revenge really do us any good?
10 Ways to get even with a narcissist once the abuse is over
It’s time to make them suffer for once…
1) Live your best life
Enjoying yourself and living your life without limits or worries is one of, if not the biggest slaps in the face a narcissist can ever receive. Now, the sad truth is that they hate to see their former victims having fun and doing well for themselves. They like to believe that their mistreatment will torture their victims continuously, to the point where they are incapable of enjoying anything ever again.
2) Expose them
Exposing a narcissist is tricky business, however it is the purest and most effective form of revenge you could ever get on them. Exposing them for what they are to their entourage will definitely catch them off guard and could even lead to their world imploding on them. By explaining to other people how dangerous they are, you’ll finally have the upper hand and could even save other potential victims from falling into their grasp.
3) Get rid of their gifts
The truth is, these vindictive folks use love bombing as a way of getting people on side and will shower them with grandiose gifts as a way of buying their affection. To get even with them, you need to throw out every souvenir and remnant of them. Whether you donate their gifts to charity, you throw them in the trash, or you burn them, they need to disappear. By ridding yourself of their souvenirs, you’ll metaphorically break the chain of power they had over you, and finally start to heal.
4) Chase the goals they laughed at
People who enjoy torturing others often make a point of mocking their goals and objectives, as a way of making them feel worthless. So, once you are free of your energy sucking parasite, be sure to reevaluate things and reinstate the dreams that you wrote off for so long due to the abuse you suffered. Furthermore, chasing your dreams will teach you to be ambitious once again, as well as help you get your confidence back.
5) Learn to love yourself
Falling in love with yourself for the strong and independent woman you are is most certainly the sweetest form of revenge you can ever achieve. Now, it’s only natural that being in a relationship with a narcissist drained you of your self-belief and esteem, but despite the battles you have been through, know that you are worth your weight in gold! In short, you do deserve to be loved, especially by yourself.
>>> Discover; 10 Ways to develop the IT factor
6) Stop wondering about the ‘what ifs’
Getting total revenge on a narcissistic abuser means that you need to hit them where it hurts, and that’s their ego. By totally cutting them out of your life and not wasting a second of your time by thinking about them and what could have been, you’ll definitely get even. Ultimately, reflecting on the 'what ifs' is a total waste of time because narcissists never change and only take pleasure in hurting people.
7) Reconnect with the friends you lost
If you want to get even with a narcissist, the best way to go about it, is by rebuilding and reclaiming your old life. Now, these egocentric and self-absorbed manipulators love tearing their victims away from their loved ones, because isolation is a key part of their evil plan. When their victims are totally helpless and alone, they can exert full power over them, and do with them as they please.
8) Look your best
When you look good on the outside, you feel happy on the inside. Feeling good about yourself will radiate the positive energy within you and attract the right people to your side. Plus, looking and feeling like a movie star will drive your former narcissist abuser absolutely crazy. Getting even never looked, or felt so good!
9) Learn to be happy on your own
After being in an emotionally abusive relationship with a narcissistic ex, it’s normal to feel lost and out of sorts. You’ll need time to recover and process everything you’ve been through, meaning that time is your best friend in this scenario. During the healing period, you need to learn to be selfish and focus on yourself exclusively. You’ll need to learn how to build your confidence back up and discover what you can do to fall back in love with yourself.
10) Treat yourself
Get your hair done, visit the nail salon, go for a shopping spree, or head out for a massage. Now I’m sure you’ve already got the message, but if you need it repeated in even clearer terms, after everything you’ve no doubt been through, you deserve to feel good about yourself and self-care is an extremely important step in getting better, so what are you waiting for?!
What words can destroy a narcissist? - 5 Things that drive them crazy
They say that actions speak louder than words, but that’s not always the case, and as far as I’m concerned, they go hand in hand. The long and winding path to freeing yourself from the mental torture of a relentless abuser first starts by standing up to them verbally. Here are 5 things these parasites will hate hearing;
This is the simplest, yet the most effective retort you can issue your abuser with. Saying no may seem like a pretty trivial, however, in reality it is a synonym of taking back the power and standing up for yourself.
2) “I don’t believe you”
Calling a narcissist out for under-delivering will rattle them to the core. When they realize that you no longer trust them, they really start to panic, to the point of believing that they are losing their hold over you.
3) “You’re not the center of my world”
Here, their ego will take an instant hit, and remind them that the world doesn’t revolve around them, no matter what they believe. This simple sentence will put these egotistical and self-centered people right in their place.
4) “I'll decide for myself”
Narcissists will ALWAYS try and impose their vision, choices, and opinions on their victims, no matter how hard you resist. These pathological manipulators will do anything to get you to dance to the beat of their drum…
5) “You don’t scare me”
Fear is the expert gaslighter’s best friend when it comes to controlling their victims, which is why convincing them that you are no longer afraid will in fact scare the wits out of them. Showing them your courage will free you from the spiral of abuse.
Editor’s opinion - Revenge is a dish best served cold
In this particular case, getting even doesn’t have to involve any form of physical violence, but instead involves endless self-care and intensive introspection, which are elements that will eventually lead you to finding peace within yourself. After enduring such hardship at the hands of an abuser, you’ll inevitably change, but that doesn’t mean you have to remain broken forever. By giving yourself time and love, you’ll get your shine back in no time!
🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!
Be sure to check out these articles too;