How To Get Revenge On A Narcissist? - 10 Ways To Get Even

Last updated by Katie M.

Narcissistic abuse is one of the most horrific challenges anyone can ever go through in life, but that’s not to say that their reign of terror will last forever. Evidently, breaking the cycle of abuse isn’t exactly straightforward, however, once the discard phase has been activated and victims realize that they can walk away with their heads held high, the revenge phase can commence 😈. Unsurprisingly, getting even with a raging egocentric narcissist needs to be carefully planned, but ironically, their self-centered personalities expose to many axes of revenge, which will evidently really get to them…

How To Get Revenge On A Narcissist? - 10 Ways To Get Even

When someone hurts us, be it someone we love, or someone we are friends with, the darker side of our human nature kicks in, and means we want to get revenge. Now, when it comes to vicious narcissists who will stop at nothing to make our lives miserable, it’s only natural that we want to get our own back, but it’s not always as simple as that. These slippery characters are expert plotters and know their victims like the backs of their hands, meaning revenge needs to be well thought through in order to have an impact. After unfortunately dating several of these evil specimens, I know what hurts them most. The truth is, you don’t need to resort to threats or violence to get even with them, all you need to do is focus on getting yourself back to the original version of yourself 💪.

>>> Discover; Does revenge really do us any good?

The best 10 revenge ideas for a narcissist - Here's how to get even 😨

It’s time to make them suffer for once…

1) Living your best life is the easiest way to get revenge on a narcissist

Enjoying yourself and living your life without limits or worries is one of, if not the biggest slaps in the face a narcissist can ever receive. Now, the sad truth is that they hate to see their former victims having fun and doing well for themselves. They like to believe that their mistreatment will torture their victims continuously, to the point where they are incapable of enjoying anything ever again. By proving them wrong and turning things around for yourself, you'll definitely gain the upper-hand and might even make them feel terrible about themselves.

2) Expose them

Exposing a narcissist is tricky business, however it is the purest and most effective form of revenge you could ever get on them. Exposing them for what they are to their entourage will definitely catch them off guard and could even lead to their world imploding on them. By explaining to other people how dangerous they are, you’ll finally have the upper hand and could even save other potential victims from falling into their grasp. Prevention is the safest and most effective way to stop other people falling into the grasp of an abuser.

3) Get rid of their gifts

The truth is, these vindictive folks use love bombing as a way of getting people on side and will shower them with grandiose gifts as a way of buying their affection, because that's the only way they can get it. To get even with them, you need to throw out every souvenir and remnant of them. Whether you donate their gifts to charity, you throw them in the trash, or you burn them, they need to disappear. By ridding yourself of their souvenirs, you’ll metaphorically break the chain of power they had over you, and finally start to heal. After all, objects do represent powerful reminders of the past.

4) Chase the goals they laughed at

People who enjoy torturing others often make a point of mocking their goals and objectives, as a way of making them feel worthless. So, once you are free of your energy sucking parasite, be sure to reevaluate things and reinstate the dreams that you wrote off for so long due to the abuse you suffered. Whether you finally decide to go back to school or choose to pursue a new sport, it's time to live your life for YOU! Furthermore, chasing your dreams will teach you to be ambitious once again, as well as help you get your confidence back.

5) Learn to love yourself

Falling in love with yourself for the strong and independent woman you are is most certainly the sweetest form of revenge you can ever achieve. Now, it’s only natural that being in a relationship with a narcissist drained you of your self-belief and esteem, but despite the battles you have been through, know that you are worth your weight in gold! Reconnecting with your qualities will help you realize that you are strong enough to stand on your own two feet. In short, you do deserve to be loved, especially by yourself.

>>> Discover; 10 Ways to develop the IT factor

6) Stop wondering about the ‘what ifs’

Getting total revenge on a narcissistic abuser means that you need to hit them where it hurts, and that’s their ego. By totally cutting them out of your life and not wasting a second of your time by thinking about them and what could have been, you’ll definitely get even. Ultimately, reflecting on the 'what ifs' is a total waste of time because narcissists never change and only take pleasure in hurting people. It's normal to have questions swirling around your mind after walking away from a relationship, however, limiting them in the case is no doubt the healthiest option.

7) Reconnect with the friends you lost

If you want to get even with a narcissist, the best way to go about it, is by rebuilding and reclaiming your old life. Now, these egocentric and self-absorbed manipulators love tearing their victims away from their loved ones, because isolation is a key part of their evil plan. When their victims are totally helpless and alone, they can exert full power over them, and do with them as they please. Reaching out to people you have previously cut off may seem intimidating, but in the long run, it will do you the world of good to explore having a social life.

>>> Read; Why do I feel bad when people don't message me back?

8) Look your best

When you look good on the outside, you feel happy on the inside. Feeling good about yourself will radiate the positive energy within you and attract the right people to your side. Plus, looking and feeling like a movie star will drive your former narcissist abuser absolutely crazy. So, get your hair done, go for a weekly manicure, and don't forget about your lashes! Getting even never looked, or felt so good 💄!

9) Learn to be happy on your own

After being in an emotionally abusive relationship with a narcissistic ex, it’s normal to feel lost and out of sorts. You’ll need time to recover and process everything you’ve been through, meaning that time is your best friend in this scenario. During the healing period, you need to learn to be selfish and focus on yourself exclusively. You’ll need to learn how to build your confidence back up and discover what you can do to fall back in love with yourself.

10) Put yourself first

Now I’m sure you’ve already got the message, but if you need it repeated in even clearer terms, after everything you have no doubt been through, you deserve to feel good about yourself and self-care is an extremely important step in getting better, so what are you waiting for?! It's time for you to start considering yourself and your needs, because after neglecting them for so long, it may take you longer to connect with them.

What words can destroy a narcissist? - 5 Things that drive them crazy 😡

They say that actions speak louder than words, but that’s not always the case, and as far as I’m concerned, they go hand in hand. The long and winding path to freeing yourself from the mental torture of a relentless abuser first starts by standing up to them verbally. Here are 5 things these parasites will hate hearing;

1) “No!”

This is the simplest, yet the most effective retort you can issue your abuser with. Saying no may seem like a pretty trivial, however, in reality it is a synonym of taking back the power and standing up for yourself.

2) “I don’t believe you”

Calling a narcissist out for under-delivering will rattle them to the core. When they realize that you no longer trust them, they really start to panic, to the point of believing that they are losing their hold over you.

3) “You’re not the center of my world”

Here, their ego will take an instant hit, and remind them that the world doesn’t revolve around them, no matter what they believe. This simple sentence will put these egotistical and self-centered people right in their place.

4) “I'll decide for myself”

Narcissists will ALWAYS try and impose their vision, choices, and opinions on their victims, no matter how hard you resist. These pathological manipulators will do anything to get you to dance to the beat of their drum…

5) “You don’t scare me”

Fear is the expert gaslighter’s best friend when it comes to controlling their victims, which is why convincing them that you are no longer afraid, will in fact scare the wits out of them. Showing them your courage will free you from the spiral of abuse.

👿 Practical tip time: Here's how to make a narcissist regret hurting you 👿

When you're involved in a relationship with a malicious, abusive ego-maniac, the best thing to do is take the high road and do nothing. Walk away, don't look back, and deal with your pain on your own. When you're angry and all you can think about is getting even, these negative emotions have a detrimental effect on you. For one thing, they slow down your healing process and keep you fixated on the situation and the pain. When you're so angry, you become paranoid and jaded. Don't let this toxic relationship change who you are and turn you into a bitter, angry person. Try to forgive the harm the narcissistic pervert has done to you, not to let him back into your life, but for yourself, to turn the page and move on.

And remember, even if you think you've been wronged, you can heal yourself and go on to have a healthy, happy relationship with someone else, but not your toxic ex. All their relationships are doomed to suffer the same fate. So be grateful that your ex is someone else's problem now.

Editor’s opinion - You'll eventually get your own back

In this particular case, getting even doesn’t have to involve any form of physical violence, but instead involves endless self-care and intensive introspection, which are elements that will eventually lead you to finding peace within yourself. After enduring such hardship at the hands of an abuser, you’ll inevitably change, but that doesn’t mean you have to remain broken forever. By giving yourself time and love, you’ll get your shine back in no time!

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!


Connect with an advisor

Be sure to check out these articles too;

Article presented by Katie M.

🌻 Discover the world through my eyes.

New supply was informed

Rosanne a year ago

Our most popular 'psychology' articles:

What Do Narcissists Hate The Most? - 10 Things That Drive Them Crazy

Knowing what narcissist manipulators hates can help victims to break free from their evil psychological grip. Indeed, even these manipulators see themselves as invulnerable beings, their victims often ignore how their pathological narcissism makes them suffer in many ways. 😱 Let's take a closer look at what these cunning beings cannot stand, and what exactly drives them wild. Now, we all get angry for one reason or another, but people with this personality disorder have different triggers related to the things they despise.

Can A Narcissist Become Obsessed With Someone?

Now, narcissists are known for demonstrating a worrying lack of empathy along with deviously manipulative traits, oh, and before I forget to mention it, HUGE egos too 😈. Yes, that’s right, they love spending hours looking in the mirror and being told how fabulous they are. To put it in other words, people with this personality disorder are firmly in love with themselves, to the point of being totally obsessed with their so-called perfection, but the question is, can they put their self-admiration aside enough to become preoccupied with someone else? If, on the other hand, you're looking to get a narcissist hooked on you, you're in the right place with these tips.

The 10 Weak Points Of A Narcissist Revealed

Each one of us has our own weaknesses that hold us back in life; be it at work or in relationships. However, on a more positive note, most of us have the will to work on them and transform them. That being said, once narcissists are brought into the picture, the idea that they want to work on their weaknesses doesn’t exactly seem feasible. For a deeper understanding of these narcissists and more insights into the workings of their minds, discover their weak spots and which pointers they struggle with on a daily basis, yet aren't willing to admit or work on 👎.

Are Narcissists Insecure?

There is no denying that narcissistic personalities display some deeply worrying and disturbing traits, but what if these devious traits were just a means of protection? What if they were in fact a complete facade, fabricated to keep people away, in the hope of hiding their deepest darkest insecurities? 😱 After all, everyone has weak spots, even the most confident and put together of people, so why wouldn’t a narcissist deal with the same niggling doubts as everyone else? It's time we got to the bottom of this and discovered why these folks are so insecure.

What Is The 333 Rule For Anxiety And Panic Attacks? It's A Soothing Technique

I want to be completely open and honest with you, so let’s get started. Anxiety has dominated my life for the past 5 years and has been at the root of countless panic attacks and bouts of intense stress 😟. You’ve probably guessed it, but it has had a devastating impact on my mental health and has therefore changed my life for the worst. Now, I’m not here for a pity party, but instead of focusing on the negative sides of this condition, I want to share the most effective tip I’ve found when it comes to feeling less anxious and reducing panic attacks; so without further ado, let’s take a look at the 3-3-3 rule.

Split Personality

Are you familiar with dissociative personality disorder? You may well think of schizophrenia, yet the two conditions are different. What is dissociative personality disorder? We’ll explain all.

How To Heal From The Pain Of Being Rejected

Whether it’s the breakdown of a relationship, a family dispute, or even being fired dismissal... We have all experienced the feeling of being rejected, excluded, or left out. Whilst some people manage to bounce back quite quickly, others suffer from it in a persistent way. As for me, I understood how to move on, because I was able to recognize my rejection wound. So, how can we overcome the fear of rejection and move on from it?


“He’s lying through his teeth!” You’re confronted with a mythomaniac in your close circle. You had no doubts about what they were saying and after conducting your own little investigation, you’re stunned! They’ve been leading you on since the beginning… They invented a life for themselves. But why? How do you recognize a liar, and how can you protect yourself? We’ll tell you everything.

Why We Feel So Socially Exhausted After Lockdown

“Are you coming to the party on Saturday?” After months of restrictions and several lockdowns, I must admit that I wasn’t expecting to hear this question. So I did a series of things, I had drinks with my girlfriends, I went to parties, lunches, etc. And without realizing it, I felt exhausted. Why do I feel like I've been running on empty since the end of lockdown?

More insights into our personalities:

Ergophobia: When The Fear Of Work Eats Away At You…

I know the real fear of work. I suffered from it for a long time, but I’m happy to say that today I’m cured. It’s an illness that can make others smile, as you can easily be seen as lazy. However, it’s not the case for people suffering from ergophobia, the fear of work. Where does this fear come from? How can it be treated? All will be explained.

6 Differences Between Being Self-Centered And Being A Narcissist

When it comes to mental health disorders, the parameters of each condition often seem blurry, and this explains why many of us have trouble identifying them. Plus, certain disorders frequently encompass similar symptoms and traits, making recognizing and therefore understanding them even more complicated. Let’s take being selfish and having a narcissistic personality disorder, for example. Because they overlap on such a huge scale, upon first glance, they do in fact seem indistinguishable to many of us. That being said, when you dig a little deeper, the differences do become more and more apparent.

I Have Fits Of Anger

Anyone who’s never felt anger can close this article! We’ve all felt this virulent emotion at one time or another 😡. It’s neither bad nor good, but it has the right to exist. It’s healthy to feel angry when you’re betrayed or a victim of an injustice. However, when anger attacks are recurrent, it’s good to learn how to control them. When anger hurts others or ourselves, it becomes a problem.

I’m Scared Of Failure

“I won’t manage it”, “I can’t do it”… I often say this because I doubt my abilities tremendously. Being so negative allows me to calm my fear of failure a bit. By doing nothing, I don’t run the risk of failing. I prefer to do nothing and remain in a state of waiting, for fear of not succeeding. So I procrastinate, thinking about the fact that I didn’t take the plunge out of anxiety. How can I overcome this fear to really start doing things?

Why I Hate Conflict And What I Need To Do To Face It

As soon as I feel tension build up with someone close to me, I take flight. I don’t like conflict, even if I don’t agree with the other person, I run from it. As a result, I keep it all inside of me, which can generate a lot of annoyance. Rather than this eating away at us from the inside, we need to learn to overcome this fear of conflict to make our voice heard. Why do we run away from conflict? How can we overcome this fear? Here are some explanations.

What Are The Signs That You Are Unhappy?

I sometimes feel bad, I don’t have the energy anymore… When we encounter financial, family, or other difficulties, as well as serious events such as bereavement, we accumulate psychological wounds. We can be resilient and move on, but we can also be overwhelmed by a growing sense of unease. There’s no shame in feeling bad psychologically, it happens to us all. However, spotting the signs of unhappiness enables us to be alert and to take care of our mental health.

8 Reasons Why Millennials Feel So Lost

If you ever find yourself watching the news or reading traditional journalism outlets, you’ll no doubt have picked up on the bad rep that millennials get. That’s right, we millennials (those of us who were born between 1981 – 1996) are often criticized for being ‘woke’, overly sensitive, entitled, and lazy. Now, isn’t that a bunch of adjectives you’d instantly like to forget! As you can probably tell, I don’t agree with the evaluation regarding our age group and am here to explain why we feel so lost and disconnected.

Why Do We Like Being Scared?

Making up ghost stories, talking about horrible legends, wanting to talk about spirits… I think we all did it when we were children. Even as adults, if we like watching horror films or documentaries about serial killers, it’s because we love scaring ourselves! 😱 However, the question we may ask ourselves is why we like being scared? There are neuropsychological and sociological reasons behind this attraction. All will be explained!

How To Get Rid Of Your Horrid Complexes

Legs too fat, lips too small, scars or even shyness, whether it’s physical or psychological, complexes often have the bad taste of spoiling our lives and making us unhappy. But we won’t let them do that to us! We’re worth more than that, right?

Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist


  1. Only LoveBen Howard
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
  4. Beautiful DayU2
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
  6. White FlagDido
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
  15. With Or Without YouU2
  16. HelloAdele
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
  19. WingsBirdy
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar

How to detect a narcissist?

How to detect a narcissist?

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." 

- Oscar Wilde