Can Narcissists Change? No, A Leopard Won't Change Its Spots

Last updated by Katie M.

If you’ve ever had the pleasure or in this case displeasure to meet someone with narcissistic tendencies, you’ll probably already have a firm opinion on the question above. Indeed, folks with this particular mental health condition lack empathy, have inflated egos, and can be extremely harmful to our mental health. The truth is, their toxic personality traits are so deeply ingrained in them, that embarking on the process of changing and becoming better people is an extremely difficult mission for them. Most experts would agree that in the majority of cases, it is in fact mission impossible, so without further ado, here is why change is so unlikely in people with NPD (narcissistic personality disorders).

Can Narcissists Change? No, A Leopard Won't Change Its Spots
Contents:

Clinical psychologist and mental health professional; Dr. Ramani believes that 10% - 15% of people display narcissistic tendencies, which only reinforces the need for grasping a better understanding of their complex personalities and why they’ll never leave their manipulative and calculating side behind forever, despite claiming they are willing to.

5 Reasons why narcissists will never change

1) In many cases, they’re oblivious to their actions

Now, I’m not suggesting that people with NPD are explicitly evil and set out to do harm, but their inherent narcissistic traits mean that they struggle to see what the problem with the behavior is. After all, when manipulation, dishonesty, and ruthlessness come naturally to you, it’s understandably tough to see the bigger picture and imagine the consequences of your actions. Their grandiose egos and assurance regarding always being right mean that they are often blind to how much damage and pain they actually inflict on their victims.

2) They love power too much

Nothing excites a narcissist more than feeling omnipotent, feared, and to a certain extent respected by their victims. For people with this character disorder, control is like a drug and gives them what they need to feel completely untouchable. When we deepen our understanding of their traits, we soon realize that they’ll never choose to become what they consider is a ‘normal person’, or willingly relinquish control.

>>> Read up on how to deal with a narcissist

3) Change is something you have to want, and these guys don’t want it…

Whether it’s splitting up with your partner, moving to a new city or applying for a new job, change is a big step for all of us, yet some of us are more equipped to deal with it. The idea of wanting to do something different or become better needs to come from within, because it’s this determination that will drive us towards results. Change

Wanting something to happen is essential in putting things into place, and such devious traits are incompatible with the desire for self-improvement.

4) They hate facing up to their faults

No one ever really enjoys fessing up to their mistakes and acknowledging their errors, however, here we are dealing with personality profiles that simply find it impossible to hold their hands up. Feeling the need to go about things differently is often provoked by introspection and intense self-questioning, which in itself requires a sense of humility and open-mindedness; things that these personalities evidently lack…

5) They are often surrounded by enablers

Unfortunately, we don’t just change at the snap of our fingers, and instead, the process involves lots of intense effort and dedication. Choosing a different path is always difficult, especially when your entourage feeds into your toxicity and refuses to make you face up to your reality. Narcissists are always very careful in regard to whom they spend their time with and will never willingly associate themselves with people who see through their facade, and especially not those who are bold enough to open their eyes to their unacceptable behavior.

Editor’s opinion - Ignore their pledges and promises

The unfortunate truth is that narcissists aren’t capable of change and deep down don’t want to do things differently because they are too proud and stubborn to admit to their wrongdoings. Whether you are in a relationship with one or just friends with one, for the sake of your mental health, you need to stand strong and ignore their pleas and empty promises regarding change. After all, we are dealing with an illness that can never be completely cured, although that being said, with lots of determination, good intentions, and consistent therapeutic accompaniment, these toxic traits can be alleviated and lessened.

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

More interesting content for you:

Article presented by Katie M.

🌻 Discover the world through my eyes.

Read our latest articles here:

8 Reasons Why All Narcissists Are Hypocrites

If you know anything about narcissists, you'll surely be aware that they are extremely overly judgmental and critical, especially towards other people. Their faultfinding stems from their perception of ultimate superiority, and therefore legitimizes them in holding people to intimidatingly high standards 👑. However, although they may believe they are pretty much perfect, the reality couldn't be any more different, yet they are slightly more forgiving with themselves. That's right, they are huge hypocrites and go from one extreme to another in a split second. Here we discuss the reasons behind their hypocritical behavior.

Do Narcissists Fear Intimacy?

This will probably come as no surprise to most of us, but in case any of you have a few remaining doubts, know that a relationship with a narcissist is nigh on impossible for a number of reasons. Now, we know that people with this personality disorder lack empathy, and aren’t exactly faithful in relationships, but what if all of their romantic shortfalls were down to them being afraid of intimacy and looking weak? 😨 Let’s explore this theory together and jump into the psyche of these dangerously toxic personas. Plus, we'll delve into how to approach intimacy after narcissistic abuse.

What Is The Tinkerbell Effect In Psychology?

Brilliant, ambitious, perfectionist... These words correspond to some people, especially women, who suffer from “Tinkerbell” syndrome. But as in all fairy tales, there’s a dark side... Just like Peter Pan’s fairy, they try to impress and are perpetually unfulfilled, compulsively seductive, and even manipulative 🧚. Psychotherapist Sylvie Tenenbaum coined this term after noticing that some people were obsessed with appearances and success. Let’s explain.

Who Do Narcissists Target?

If reading up on narcissists terrifies you, you probably already realize how dangerous their toxic personalities can be. Although, that being said, I’m probably going to add to the list of reasons as to why you should be ultra wary of these abusers, by revealing who they prey on. One thing that can be said about narcissists is that they certainly aren’t predictable people! 😱 Plus, spoiler alert, they don’t necessarily always choose to emotionally abuse seemingly weak people, no, in fact, they often choose bigger fish to fry because they love a challenge. Discover the types of personalities they hone in on and why.

What Is The Narcissistic Stare? - 5 Reasons Why They Glare 👀

Narcissists have a reputation for being amongst the most manipulative people out there, and rightly so! The truth is, these people are so good at the evil things they do because they operate under the radar and use covert methods to exercise their depraved missions. Now, one of the biggest and seemingly most unsuspecting techniques they use to manipulate and control their victims is staring. You're no doubt a little dubious about a stare being an effective tool in the art of manipulation, but it's true, a void and menacing look is one of the most intimidating and unnerving gestures that these folks turn to.

Are Covert Narcissists Dangerous?

The concept of covert narcissism, or as it’s also known, ‘vulnerable narcissism’ is a fairly recent one. Now, these terms may seem pretty harmless, but the reality couldn’t be any more serious. The truth is covert narcissists present themselves to the world as anxious, socially uncertain, sullen, and withdrawn, yet, in actual fact, they share the same grandiose and unemphatic traits as their exhibitionist counterparts 😱. That’s right, these folks are just as equally skilled in the dark arts of manipulation as overt narcissists, although, they tend to hide their true intentions with more finesse, making them even more dangerous. Learn here why they are so dangerous, what they do, and what they say.

5 Scary Things A Narcissist Smear Campaign Involves

We hear so much about these emotional abusers in every walk of life that we are sometimes so overloaded with information regarding them, meaning we often miss the red flags that, in hindsight, seem blatantly obvious. These vindictive manipulators often use smear campaigns as a way of getting back at their victims and villainizing them publicly. That's right, these evil campaigns are an effective method for them to change the narrative of the abuse, and to present themselves as victims, when in reality they are the perpetrators of the terror.

Are Narcissists Lonely?

Loneliness is one of society’s biggest enemies, and none of us are exempt from it, not even the most devilish of narcissists out there. In fact, throughout the Coronavirus pandemic, 36% of Americans claimed that they have never felt lonelier, which sets a scary benchmark for the wider population 😔. Now, lots of us would no doubt immediately assume that narcissists are too independent and strong-willed to feel alone, however, the truth is they are often the biggest victims of loneliness, yet simply have trouble expressing their inner malaise.

Why Do I Feel Bad When People Don’t Message Me Back?

Friday night rolls around and after a hard week you were expecting to have a drink with a girlfriend, but she seems to have left you hanging on read... To make matters worse (and the humiliation?) you even saw the little typing sign appear, yet you never received a reply. Well, if that’s the case, obviously you or your "how about a drink tonight?" didn’t deserve an answer. Let’s take a look at why some people don't reply to messages, and why when someone doesn't reply to your text, this makes us feel so bad.

Are Narcissists Insecure?

There is no denying that narcissistic personalities display some deeply worrying and disturbing traits, but what if these devious traits were just a means of protection? What if they were in fact a complete facade, fabricated to keep people away, in the hope of hiding their deepest darkest insecurities? 😱 After all, everyone has weak spots, even the most confident and put together of people, so why wouldn’t a narcissist deal with the same niggling doubts as everyone else? It's time we got to the bottom of this and discovered why these folks are so insecure.



Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:17
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:17
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41

How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack