Dating a narcissist is definitely no easy feat and is almost always damaging for your mental health and self-esteem. Now, I’m sure we’d all agree that no one would willingly date such a manipulative character, yet many of us end up being duped by these supposedly charming yet cunning personalities. These personalities have a way with words and know how to make us feel special, which often clouds our judgement. We all want that ideal fairytale love, yet someone who suffers from NPD is simply incapable of fulfilling our needs and making us feel emotionally safe. If you want to avoid dating a narcissist, you are certainly in the right place because I’m about to share my insights into how to identify this personality type in love.
>>> Discover what narcissists do to people
10 Signs your partner is a narcissist
These are the red flags that you are currently with a poorly intentioned partner.
1) Your partner constantly love bombs you
If your man often goes way overboard with grandiose gestures, you certainly need to start asking yourself some tough questions. Spoiling someone with affectionate gifts from time to time is fine, but when it becomes too frequent it borders on blackmail and emotional abuse. Buying someone’s love and affection with gifts is devious and hides darker motives.
2) Arguments always seem to be your fault
Now, one of the biggest life lessons I learned from dating my ex was that he was simply unable to accept responsibility for anything. From forgetting to pick up the mail or being late to dinner, he never apologized and couldn’t see why he needed to. The same principle applied to our arguments; here no matter what happened, everything was my fault.
3) You feel like you are constantly being controlled
If you often receive hundreds of angry voicemail messages demanding to know where you are, whenever you are out with friends, alarm bells should be ringing in your head. Narcissistic behaviour means these folks have such a strong sense of entitlement that they need to know your every whereabouts, plus who you are with.
4) Your partner never shows any empathy
Whenever I’d had a horrible day at work, I could always count on my ex coldly telling me to get over it and move on. His lack of empathy was astounding, yet eventually made me realize that he was only interested in paying attention to himself and his own problems. My feelings didn’t matter and were almost always swept under the rug.
5) Your opinion is always ignored
My relationship with my ex taught me that with him, my point of view just didn’t count. In my own personal experience, I never had a say in anything, be it where we’d go out to eat or even what I wanted to do on the weekend. My needs and desires were always less important than his and he was never even willing to hear me out on what I wanted or thought.
6) Your partner puts their own sexual needs first
People with NPD believe their sexual pleasure is more important than their partner’s, which is why they’ll never make an effort to please them between the sheets. They believe that they are superior, so why would they consider anyone else?
>>> Discover how narcissists behave sexually
7) Your partner compares you to their exes
If your partner gets his kicks out of comparing you to his ex and pointing out how beautiful she was, you need to start plotting your escape from the relationship because he is toxic! Stirring up trouble and then waiting for the firework is definitely a narcissist’s favorite activity.
8) You receive constant criticism
From snide remarks about your weight to fashion critiques, for NPD sufferers, nothing you do will ever be good enough, no matter how hard you try. Although, you must know that they’ll never lower their standards or concede that you are in fact deserving of better.
9) Your man gaslights you
In the most extreme cases, narcissistic behavior can turn into gaslighting to the point where victims start to question their own sanity. This point is also linked to the fact that these emotional abusers are never willing to hold their hands up and accept responsibility, instead they choose to unload the blame on others and distort the truth.
10) They constantly try to toy with you and your feelings
Whether it’s by ignoring your tears and cries for help or simply making you believe outrageous rumors, these types of partners will do anything to wind you up. Their goal is to make you feel bad about yourself and what better way to achieve it than by making you vulnerable and worthless?
Editor’s opinion - If you recognize your partner in the descriptions, walk away
The ideal love doesn’t exist, but that’s not to say that we should automatically accept abusive behavior when it comes to relationships. When we are in a relationship, our partner should make us feel good about ourselves, not worthless, insecure or worn down. Although breaking up with someone you have feelings for is challenging, if your partner displays narcissistic traits, you certainly won’t regret your decision in the long run.
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