10 Signs You Are Dating A Narcissist - Don't Ignore The Red Flags

Last updated by Katie M.

Even though we all grew up dreaming of the perfect Disney-esque romance, we no doubt all wholeheartedly agree that relationships certainly aren’t easy, yet they are made even tougher when a narcissistic partner is added to the mix. As someone who has previously dated a guy with a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), I’ve decided to share the 10 ultimate red flags and warning signs that your Prince Charming is actually more of a poisonous frog than anything else.

10 Signs You Are Dating A Narcissist - Don't Ignore The Red Flags
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Dating a narcissist is definitely no easy feat and is almost always damaging for your mental health and self-esteem. Now, I’m sure we’d all agree that no one would willingly date such a manipulative character, yet many of us end up being duped by these supposedly charming yet cunning personalities. These personalities have a way with words and know how to make us feel special, which often clouds our judgment. We all want that ideal fairy tale love, yet someone who suffers from NPD is simply incapable of fulfilling our needs and making us feel emotionally safe. If you want to avoid dating a narcissist, you are certainly in the right place because I’m about to share my insights into how to identify this personality type in love.

>>> Discover what narcissists do to people

10 Signs your partner is a narcissist

These are the red flags that you are currently with a poorly intentioned partner.

1) Your partner constantly love bombs you

If your man often goes way overboard with grandiose gestures, you certainly need to start asking yourself some tough questions. Spoiling someone with affectionate gifts from time to time is fine, but when it becomes too frequent, it borders on blackmail and emotional abuse. Buying someone’s love and affection with gifts is devious and hides darker motives.

>>> Find out here what love bombing is

2) Arguments always seem to be your fault

Now, one of the biggest life lessons I learned from dating my ex was that he was simply unable to accept responsibility for anything. From forgetting to pick up the mail or being late to dinner, he never apologized and couldn’t see why he needed to. The same principle applied to our arguments; here, no matter what happened, everything was my fault.

3) You feel like you are constantly being controlled

If you often receive hundreds of angry voicemail messages demanding to know where you are, whenever you are out with friends, alarm bells should be ringing in your head. Narcissistic behavior means these folks have such a strong sense of entitlement that they need to know your every whereabouts, plus who you are with.

4) Your partner never shows any empathy

Whenever I’d had a horrible day at work, I could always count on my ex coldly telling me to get over it and move on. His lack of empathy was astounding, yet eventually made me realize that he was only interested in paying attention to himself and his own problems. My feelings didn’t matter and were almost always swept under the rug.

5) Your opinion is always ignored

My relationship with my ex taught me that with him, my point of view just didn’t count. In my own personal experience, I never had a say in anything, be it where we’d go out to eat or even what I wanted to do on the weekend. My needs and desires were always less important than his, and he was never even willing to hear me out on what I wanted or thought.

6) Your partner puts their own sexual needs first

People with NPD believe their sexual pleasure is more important than their partner’s, which is why they’ll never make an effort to please them between the sheets. They believe that they are superior, so why would they consider anyone else?

>>> Discover how narcissists behave sexually

7) Your partner compares you to their exes

If your partner gets his kicks out of comparing you to his ex and pointing out how beautiful she was, you need to start plotting your escape from the relationship because he is toxic! Stirring up trouble and then waiting for the firework is definitely a narcissist’s favorite activity.

8) You receive constant criticism

From snide remarks about your weight to fashion critiques, for NPD sufferers, nothing you do will ever be good enough, no matter how hard you try. Although, you must know that they’ll never lower their standards or concede that you are in fact deserving of better.

9) Your man gaslights you

In the most extreme cases, narcissistic behavior can turn into gaslighting to the point where victims start to question their own sanity. This point is also linked to the fact that these emotional abusers are never willing to hold their hands up and accept responsibility, instead, they choose to unload the blame on others and distort the truth.

10) They constantly try to toy with you and your feelings

Whether it’s by ignoring your tears and cries for help or simply making you believe outrageous rumors, these types of partners will do anything to wind you up. Their goal is to make you feel bad about yourself, and what better way to achieve it than by making you vulnerable and worthless?

What kind of woman is attracted to a narcissist? - 5 Profile types

Narcissists give off a different and destabilizing type of vibe, which means that they aren’t exactly flooded with options when it comes to dating. However, they shouldn’t be totally underestimated and written off, because they do in fact manage to attract 5 types of women, who they undoubtedly go on to hurt and metaphorically crush. Here are the personality types that find them pretty much irresistible:

  • 1) Empaths - These hypersensitivity girls literally fall head over heels for vindictive characters who portray themselves as victims. An empath’s heart is both their greatest quality and biggest downfall.
  • 2) Dreamers - Naturally romantic women will be drawn to these types of men, simply because they believe that they can change them for the better. They convince themselves that they are in need of love and affection, however, no amount of love can change a narcissist
  • 3) Naive folks - Naivety can be a very endearing quality, but in love, it can certainly lead people down dangerous paths, where they quickly find themselves out of their depth. Being incapable of seeing beyond the facade is definitely a trap.
  • 4) Girls who lack confidence - Gals with little to no self-esteem are the perfect targets for these slippery characters, who instantly assume that they will be easy to manipulate in the long-run.
  • 5) Heartbroken women - Women who have recently walked away from a relationship are also the perfect prey for these award-winning manipulators. Being heartbroken often means you have your guard down and are less likely to notice someone’s real intentions when they charm you.

What are the 5 main habits of a narcissist?

Try as they might to blend into the crowd, a narcissist can never totally hide their evil traits. Here are 5 common giveaways that you are surrounded by one of these devious folks;

  • 1) The person overestimates his or her achievements and expects to be recognized as superior, without having accomplished anything that would justify such recognition. He or she also constantly puts forward certain successes or strengths without nuance and by amplifying these achievements.
  • 2) The person is absorbed by fantasies of unlimited success, power, splendor, beauty or ideal love. Very often dissatisfied with their everyday life, they have a completely unrealistic ideal of life
  • 3) The person thinks that he/she is special and unique, and believes that he/she can only be understood by special institutions or people. They will not accept to interact with people they consider inferior
  • 4) The person has an excessive need to be admired. This is an important driver in their professional or personal life
  • 5) The person thinks that everything is due to him/her. The person has an excessive need to be admired. This is a major driving force in his or her professional or personal life.

Editor’s opinion - If you recognize your partner in the descriptions, walk away

The ideal love doesn’t exist, but that’s not to say that we should automatically accept abusive behavior when it comes to relationships. When we are in a relationship, our partner should make us feel good about ourselves, not worthless, insecure or worn down. Although breaking up with someone you have feelings for is challenging, if your partner displays narcissistic traits, you certainly won’t regret your decision in the long run.

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

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Wengood's playlist

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  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
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  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
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  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
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  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:19
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
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  19. WingsBirdy
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  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
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"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." 

- Oscar Wilde


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