Let’s face it, we all, unfortunately, know a controlling manipulator who makes us feel completely horrible about ourselves. This statement may seem a little odd because according to official statistics, narcissistic perverts make up 3% of the population. The idea of this character profile sends shivers down our spines, but what are these people like? What makes them tick? If you have suspicions about someone in your entourage, discover the common traits of a narcissist here.
How to stop being manipulated by a narcissist
The question is always the same, how do we protect ourselves from these kinds of toxic people? To help you go about it, find out how to protect yourself and keep yourself safe.
1) Learn to identify them and their traits
From the mean boss to the domineering partner, narcissistic perverts come in all shapes and sizes. Although that being said, you should be careful not to fall into the trap of detecting manipulation everywhere you look. This dangerous personality type is guilty of the following types of behavior:
- Mixed messages
- Refuses to accept their wrongdoings
- Poor communication
- Constantly criticizes
2) Stop being so dependent on other people
If you have identified someone completely toxic in your entourage, you need to start believing that you are strong enough to cut ties with them and walk away. You need to realize that you are surrounded by love and people that care about you. Try to figure out where your need for dependence comes from by opening up to a friend or mental health professional.
>>> Discover how to tell if you're in a toxic relationship.
3) Don’t show your emotions
To throw them off, you need to maintain a calm and relaxed attitude when dealing with them. Think calm thoughts and don’t react to the provocative things they say. Being both offensive and defensive is a great tactic.
4) Take notes on their behavior
Offenders prefer verbal communication and never want to leave any written traces of what they say. If you suspect your boss, throw them off by asking ‘to be sure, is that really what you want me to do?’, for example. Keeping a journal is a great way to keep track of what has been said.
>>> Learn which 4 steps to follow to break up with a narcissistic pervert.
5) Start believing in yourself
These folks will always choose to prey on people who lack confidence and self-esteem because it makes manipulation so much easier. Building up your confidence is important when faced with someone so devious and underhand. Focusing on your positive points and qualities will soon show you that you aren’t as worthless as you have been made to believe.
6) Set boundaries and respect them
To get on with other people, you need to set boundaries to feel respected. When you consider that people outwardly disrespect you and your beliefs, don’t hold back on speaking up for yourself. Learning to stand up for yourself and say no will earn you the respect you deserve.
7) Learn to counter manipulate
The ultimate aim is to stop leaving yourself vulnerable to manipulation, which is why you need to act as nothing affects you. Hiding your weaknesses from your opponent will help give you the upper hand in the manipulation battle. Here are some tips to help you counter manipulate:
- Be polite
- Make jokes
- Use proverbs and sayings
- Use ‘we’ rather than ‘I’
- Don’t get into a conversation
8) Avoid all contact with them
Even if you can’t avoid contact with the toxic people in your life, you can however try to limit your meetings. Ignore text messages, emails, and attempt to completely cut them out of your life. Forgetting about them might be tough, but it’s a necessary step to feeling better.
>>> Check out how to overcome your fear of loving
9) Get support from your entourage
Those who fall victim, often feel isolated and unable to talk about what they are going through. Feeling cut off from other people leave victims even more vulnerable and exposed, in short, speaking up is essential. A problem shared is regularly a problem halved, so confide in a friend or confidant.
What happens when you stand up to a narcissist?
Narcissists are full of pride and ego, as well as, sadness and emptiness, but when their victims take a stand against them, they’ll reveal their ugliest side and will step up the level of manipulation. They will become especially evil and relentless if they believe you are about to leave them and walk away definitively. If you do eventually walk away, they will act proud but deep down they’ll miss you (it's nice to read, but it's only a void they feel, and they'll fill it with someone else) they wait for you to come back. The only problem is that to be in a relationship with this kind of person is to serve this person...
It is difficult to forget them because for most of the chosen people we have a sense of forgiveness. When you stand up for yourself and leave, these manipulators will think about us but not in the right way, they will try to win you back, and pretend that they are the real victims.
Our editor's advice: Protect yourself
If you have detected a narcissistic pervert in your surroundings, you must learn to defend yourself. The number one rule is not to doubt yourself. Don't doubt yourself, your skills, who you are, or those around you.
The victim must work to restore their knowledge of their values, skills, and self-esteem. If they were victimized in a relationship, they must understand that their partner did not love them.
The path is not easy, but you can also get help from a psychologist to get back on your feet. Be strong.
🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!
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