Narcissists are the 21st century’s equivalent of blood-sucking vampires, yet perhaps even more dangerous for our mental health and overall wellbeing. Although folks with this personality disorder aren’t exactly likely to lurk in the dark, they are constantly on the lookout for victims to manipulate and take advantage of. Unlike vampires, narcissists don’t exactly thrive on blood, no, their fuel is being in control, as well as being seen as special and unique. That’s right, these ruthless personalities will do anything to guarantee themselves unlimited success, power, and sheer brilliance. I’ll admit it, I’ve probably left you terrified with the portrait I’ve just painted, but knowing how they work and realizing the magnitude of damage they are capable of is essential.
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10 Things narcissists do to their victims
Warning, you might just be terrified at what they are capable of...
1) They isolate them
This is the first and probably most essential step in the process of gaining ultimate control over their victims and to do so, they’ll adopt a no holds barred attitude. Cutting them off from their friends and family is crucial in pulling the strings and making their victims solely reliant on them. To create that much-needed distance, they’ll spread rumors, lie and make up stories about people in their victim’s entourage. Their goal is to sow seeds of doubt and to make it impossible for their prey to realize that they are being used.
2) They break their confidence
Narcissists have a knack for wearing people down and making them feel useless and undeserving. They are so talented at ruining self-esteem that they can even make high-status people feel bad about themselves. From insults, denigrating remarks, and outright criticism, these folks will do anything to make others feel worthless and inferior to themselves.
The irony of the situation is that they are great at making others feel bad, yet they have little to no confidence in themselves...
3) They ban them from going out
Narcissists feel legitimate in deciding what their victims can do and aren’t above banning them from going out or seeing their friends, for example. They consider themselves to be special, and this gives them the authorization to make decisions for the people they believe they exercise power over. Even the most sociable and outgoing folks risk becoming withdrawn and isolated if they end up dating someone with NPD.
4) They spy on them
If you are dating a narcissist, you may have even caught them going down your phone or secretly reading your social media messages. Indeed, their inherent traits mean that they are jealous beings who struggle to trust the people they surround themselves with.
>>> This article might interest you; Can a narcissist love you?
5) They spread rumors about their victims
Saving face is their ultimate goal and to do so, they’ll do absolutely anything in their power to make their victims look bad. At times, they can even go as far as painting themselves out to be the victim and totally turning the situation on its head. We mustn’t forget that these folks have fantasies of unlimited success and therefore refused to be ousted as abusive.
6) They threaten them
In some cases, these master manipulators become violent, especially when they believe that their power is slipping away or that they are about to be exposed. Violence isn’t exactly their style because they typically prefer mind games and mental torture.
7) They demand control
They live for control and dream of being omnipotent, so why wouldn’t they demand it? Whether it’s in friendship, love, or at work, these personalities need to be in the driving seat and the ones calling the shots. After all, how can we realistically expect such crafty thinkers to relinquish power? For them, leaving the way for other people to make decisions is equivalent to bowing down to them and therefore a synonym of weakness.
8) They invade every part of their victim’s life
What makes these people so devious is their ability to encrust themselves into every part of their victim’s life. Whether it’s going out with friends for drinks or even family dinners, you can definitely count on them being right at the front, dominating the conversations, and of course the spotlight. It’s fair to say that with them, boundaries simply don’t exist.
9) They manipulate and lie to them
In their relentless pursuit of power and ultimate control, manipulation and lies are almost obligatory steps in the process. Lying comes naturally to them and often involves promises regarding them being able to change when their victims finally decide they have had enough of the abusive behavior they’ve been subjected to.
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10) They’ll blame and shame you
Their high statuses mean that these folks struggle to acknowledge their wrongdoings and prefer to place the blame on those around them. After all, how could they ever make such mistakes, being as competent and talented as they are? When errors occur, they definitely won’t hold back in embarrassing those around them either...
Can a narcissist tell that they are a narcissist?
The simple answer is no, they are blissfully unaware of their personality disorder because they live in a sort of alternative world, which prevents them from recognizing all the evil things they do. Their huge sense of self-esteem and disproportionate ego block them from acknowledging the truth about themselves. That being said, whilst they live in a false sense of reality and are therefore incapable of picking up on their own flaws, they are very perceptive when it comes to noticing other people’s faults. That’s right, they love to spend their time analyzing people and focusing on how they could change and improve them. Ultimately, it’s a shame that they are too proud to follow the same process through on themselves…
What happens to a person that lives with a narcissist?
It can be difficult to be in a relationship with a narcissist. Most people, at first, cannot imagine that the charismatic charmer who seduced them also possesses narcissistic personality traits, such as lack of empathy, thirst for attention and heightened sensitivity to criticism. Over time, however, some unequivocal signs of narcissism may surface. For example, you may be gloating about your new outfit for the evening, while the manipulator is only thinking about the impression it will make on your friends.
They may also be constantly picking fights, accusing you of things you didn't do. But when they cross the line into narcissistic personality disorder, these frustrating events can become more frequent (leading to abuse). When it comes time to end the relationship, it is difficult to predict the narcissist's reaction, as well as to figure out how to get out of the situation.
Editor’s opinion - Ruthless tactics come into play
Narcissist traits mean that these folks are totally pitiless, which means we must adopt the necessary measures to protect ourselves and our mental health. Whenever we are faced with such brutal determination, it can be difficult to stand up to it and defend ourselves, which is why having a solid entourage is indispensable in order to avoid falling into such a trap. If ever you believe you are falling victim to this vulturous personality, the best measure to take is to communicate your concerns and ensure you are supported and protected in order to be able to take a step back.
🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!
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Great Article I been in a relationship like this for 4 years and the last 10 months of that we were engaged. 5 weeks ago I walked away and moved out. Having a tough time at times with this decision but this article opened up my eyes as I been dating one.
Great article. Thank you! Pete, I understand it wasn't easy to end your engagement but consider yourself lucky. I wasted 14yrs of my life. My Narcissus ex destroyed my mental health, finances, friends, and family. They’re pure evil. He also Had kids from a previous marriage and would use them to attack the mother. They don’t care about anyone else needs. You’ll find a healthy partner who adores you.