Being around a narcissistic personality has truly damaging effects on both our self-esteem and perception of ourselves. Here we are dealing with a personality disorder characterized by a tendency to be self-centered, exaggerate one's talents and lack empathy. These traits can certainly become problematic for sufferers and those around them. In fact, sufferers often turn to bullying and gaslighting to get us to believe their own hype.
As it happens, it is thought that 1% of the general population are narcissists, meaning being able to recognize them in your vicinity is absolutely crucial.
10 Traits which reveal that someone is a narcissist
1. The person is hugely self-centered
This facet of their personality runs deep and they often behave in childish ways to make everything about themselves. When you discuss something together or tell a story, they will always make it about themselves. They have a strong tendency for megalomania and always feel the need to outdo others.
2. They are incapable of showing empathy
They demonstrate terrifying emotional coldness and act as if it’s totally fine. If their victim expresses discomfort because of something the narcissist has done, they will do everything to prove that their victim is wrong and that they are indeed loving and caring. Lack of empathy is really one of the typical characteristics, because these folks aren’t affected by sadness of making other people cry for example. In some cases, knowing that they’ve hurt someone can even give them a certain pleasure.
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3. They see themselves as being THE most important person in the room
The person overestimates their accomplishments and expects to be recognized as superior, without having accomplished anything that would warrant such recognition. They also constantly put forward certain successes or strengths without nuance and by amplifying these accomplishments. They are often absorbed by fantasies of unlimited success, power, splendor, beauty or ideal love. However this in fact translates into them being dissatisfied with their everyday life.
4. They lie and are always vague
They will never clearly express their opinions, feelings or needs. Instead, they constantly seek to maintain ambiguity so that their victim continually tries to understand them. Lying is also common amongst them, and they spend their time inventing stories to make themselves look good. Indeed, they have a huge need for recognition and will do anything to flatter their inflated ego.
5. They tend to criticize and devalue
They belittle their victims in order to better control them and enhance their own self-esteem. They’ll attack people’s appearance by making negative comments about weight and even dress sense for example. When this is repeated on a daily basis, these phrases undermine the victim's self-confidence and make them doubt themselves. Humiliation, intimidation, verbal and psychological violence are also common tactics they use.
6. They demand perfection from others
They believe that people must respond immediately to their questions and needs. With a narcissistic pervert, there is absolutely no room for error because they simply don’t forgive. They’ll remember everything and often bring things up from the past that could embarrass you or make you look bad. For one of them, you’ll never be good enough to meet their expectations.
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7. They are two-faced
A narcissistic personality is difficult to identify because they play a double game. On the one hand, they will be incredibly psychologically violent, but on the other, they will come across as charming and polite. From the outside, nothing appears off, which is why so many people’s entourages are shocked when they find out who they are dealing with.
8. They know how to win people over
Think you're safe from this kind of person? Beware, because once the manipulator has spotted their prey, they know very well how to lure them in. They come across as very charismatic and endearing, which means that only few people resist them. They will tell you what you want to hear and play the Prince Charming card, yes that’s right, they’ll seem like the dream partner... until they reveal their true intentions.
9. They feel inferior but will never show it
Someone suffering from this disorder will display arrogant and haughty attitudes towards people and won't hesitate to put them down. That's right, they need to discredit other people in order to feel better about themselves and what they have to offer as people. Their behavior is also likely to be tinged with a sense of dominance.
10. They can’t stand not being in control
They regularly need to verify that they have complete control over their victim and that they are isolated. To accomplish this, they know how to confuse their victim and make them believe falsehoods. If this happens, it is best to analyze their actions rather than their words, so that you can truly know who you are dealing with.
How can you deal with a narcissistic personality?
When faced with this type of personality, you must not provoke them by letting them know that you are on to them, because it would cause intense panic. With this type of personality, you must be intelligent and cunning. You must put your weaknesses aside, avoid confiding in him and show that you have good self-esteem, because they will treat you the way you treat yourself.
Their manipulative power is formidable. They are so devious that they have what it takes to fool everyone along their path, including even specialists, doctors and psychologists. Nevertheless, when you are in a toxic relationship with one, time is on their side, since they use it to create a psychological and emotional dependence, which is why you must react quickly.
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Editor’s opinion: Here every second counts
There are three important steps when it comes to identifying this type of toxic behavior and they include;
1. Listening carefully to words: If the manipulator abounds with positive superlatives to seduce you and draw you in, you’ll need to have your wits about you.
2. Analyze what you feel in their presence. Doing this will soon reveal what state of mind you are in.
3. Study their behavior; do their supposedly positive actions betray them?
It is important to react quickly when faced with a narcissistic, the more the days go by, the more their hold over you grows.
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