Attachment Theory: What Does It Say? Why Is It Crucial?

The origins of the theory

At Wengood, we’ve already talked to you about John Bowlby, particularly through romantic attachment. However, we haven’t gone back over the origins of attachment theory and its importance 🧐. In 1951, the psychiatrist published a report entitled “Maternal Care and Mental Health” for the World Health Organization (WHO) on conditions in nurseries. From then on, he set out to understand the effects of prolonged separation on young children.

At the time, too little attention was paid to the relationship between children and their environment. With Freud, the focus was more on drives. Nevertheless, Bowlby refuted Freud and began to talk about “attachment” in his writings. He went on to demonstrate that babies are predisposed to attachment and that the attachment bond is crucial in meeting the child’s primary needs.

👋 Don’t know what primary needs are? You can read our article on Maslow’s Pyramid theory to learn a little more about the scale of needs.

>>> Read; What is separation anxiety?

How does attachment develop according to the theory?

Additional studies have reinforced Bowlby’s work in 1978, in particular, that of Ainsworth, Blehar, Waters, and Wall on the stages of attachment 🍼:

• From 0 to 3 months, pre-attachment phase: the baby will activate attachment behaviors through crying, but there’s no main figure yet.
• From 3 to 6 months, emergence phase: behaviors will diversify, and the baby will have a particular person as a figure.
• From 6 months to 2 years: the child has a reference figure and needs one whenever they’re feeling unwell.
• From the age of 2: multiple attachments are established because the child’s security needs have been met by the main figure.

To find out how a child forms an attachment, we can identify two types of behavior. The child will seek out their main figure (the “caregiver”) in order to feel secure and will protest if they’re separated. Attachment generally takes the form of crying, clinging on, screaming, smiling, etc. In short, any signal they can give to show that they need their attachment figure to regulate their needs and emotions.

👋 You may be interested in this article: What is narcissistic injury?

Why do we need attachment?

With these studies complementing the theory, it’s clear that we need at least one reference figure during childhood. According to Bowlby, this is crucial if we are to develop in a balanced way. Indeed, children are incapable of managing their emotions on their own or surviving if they don’t have someone to look after them. They also need a warm, consistent and predictable relationship in order to thrive.

Above all, having an attachment figure prevents us from developing fears. Yes, if there was the slightest imbalance during early childhood, we can develop a fear of abandonment, for example 🤕.

Is the theory always proven?

This theory put forward by the psychiatrist remains fairly central to therapies today. It’s a dominant approach to the creation of emotional bonds in children and has been the basis of a lot more research on the subject. Nonetheless, there have been subsequent criticisms, particularly that it doesn’t cover all aspects of social relationships. Indeed, social relationships are complex, and attachment theory has its limits and can’t explain all our adult social behaviors 🤔. Going back to my example, even though I’ve dug deeper into this aspect with my psychological care, I know that it’s not the only reason I’m the way I am. There are so many things to take into account that it’s difficult to say it’s the only cause in my case.

We therefore need to take a step back and look at all the possibilities. Attachment theory is an important concept to consider, especially when you’re a parent, but it’s not the only determining factor. If you have fears or a lack of confidence and need to understand where they come from, don’t hesitate to seek help.

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