Is Flirting Considered Cheating, Or Is It Just Harmless Fun?

Last updated by Katie M.

The question of faithfulness and the boundaries regarding this notion often crop up in relationships, and aren't just exclusively reserved for new couples. We all have different opinions on what constitutes betraying our partner's trust, but does flirting really make the list? After all, we all like a few spicy thrills in our lives, regardless of whether we're taken or not. Making eyes at George, another parent at my kid's school, when I drop them off in the morning is part of my daily routine, so is that really classed as being unfaithful or not? The answer is simple: it depends!

Is Flirting Considered Cheating, Or Is It Just Harmless Fun?

For starters, what is flirting?

Yes, it’s probably best to start by agreeing on what we understand by flirting. Flirting is nothing more than seduction, it’s when you establish a bond. According to Wikipedia, it refers to a romantic relationship characterized by frivolity and one which is free of deep feelings. But, I don’t agree at all. I see it as an opening, and I believe it’s about desire and excitement rather than love. Flirting is a playful and lighthearted way of connecting with others, often driven by curiosity and attraction. It’s a way to express interest without necessarily committing to anything deeper, making it an exciting and fun interaction for many people.

Is it ok to flirt with others whilst in a relationship?

I have been in a relationship long enough for the trust I have in my partner to be quite firm and established. Likewise, I don’t worry about what he is doing when I’m not there. So when I have fun making eyes at the server in my favorite bar, when I laugh at his jokes, make innuendos or even brush past him, I don’t feel like I’m harming my relationship. For me, it’s a game without consequences, and I can’t imagine myself getting annoyed with my partner if he enjoyed playing the same game. When it comes to wanting to feel desired, I don’t see anything wrong with it when it’s done within reason. After all, what’s wrong with wanting to please and wanting to feel attractive. 

However, it’s important to understand that not everyone feels the same way about flirting. Some people may view it as harmless fun, while others may see it as a breach of trust. Open communication with your partner about boundaries and expectations is key to ensuring that playful interactions don’t harm your relationship.

>>> I’m unhappy in my relationship, what can I do?

Are some people too jealous to be able to enjoy these fun games?

I have a friend and even after several years of marriage, jealousy is an integral part of her relationship. It’s not what I’d call unhealthy jealousy, but it’s strong enough for her not to be able to handle seeing her husband talking to another woman. For her, it’s obvious, flirting is cheating and when her husband crosses the line and partakes in it, for her, it’s a form of betrayal. She can’t stand the idea that her husband might lust after or want another woman. She, on the other hand, doesn’t flirt at all and if she found out that her husband had spent the evening chatting with another woman, I’m not sure if she would forgive him for it.

Jealousy often stems from insecurity or past experiences, and it’s not uncommon for some people to feel threatened by their partner’s interactions with others. While flirting may seem harmless to one person, it can trigger feelings of inadequacy or fear of betrayal in another. Understanding your partner’s perspective and finding a balance that works for both of you is essential for a healthy relationship.

>>> Discover why we get jealous in relationships and how to manage it

So, is flirting cheating?

It all depends on how far we go, the trust we have in ourselves, and in our relationship. Am I capable of teasing without taking it too far? Do I trust my partner enough to know he wouldn’t sleep with another person? Ultimately, the line between flirting and cheating is subjective and varies from one relationship to another. What’s most important is having an open dialogue with your partner to define boundaries and ensure mutual respect.

How do you tell if it’s flirting or not? - 2 Undeniable signs

Wondering how to tell if someone is flirting with you? Here are some signs you can look for: playful touching, eye contact, and quick texting. If any of these signs are true, there is a good chance the person is flirting with you.

1) Eye contact

In general, women do not appreciate unwanted attention from men. Therefore, they are not used to the idea of being considered for long periods of time. However, if you make eye contact with a man, and he doesn’t immediately look away, it may mean that he is attracted to you. Therefore, it is best for men to limit eye contact to brief glances and look away first when they make eye contact. If she doesn’t look away, you may have a chance to get her attention if you make eye contact more often.

Another tip for recognizing whether a man is flirting with you is to look at his behavior. Notice if he smiles or laughs a lot. If he seems genuinely happy, it is more likely that he likes you. He will also show more positive facial expressions. When he looks at you, he probably feels something for you.

2) Playful touches

One of the easiest ways to tell if someone is flirting with you is to pay attention to the way they act around you. If it seems like they’re being particularly friendly to you, it’s most likely flirting. Look for subtle movements, such as a light touch of the arm, a move toward you, or a raise of the eyebrows. These are all signs that someone is flirting with you. If you notice any of these signs, it’s time to move on to the next person.

Flirting often involves subtle cues and body language, making it easy to misinterpret. Paying attention to context and consistency in behavior can help you determine whether someone is genuinely flirting or just being friendly.

>>> You might find this article interesting: 7 Tips for an amazing sex life

Editor’s advice – “I’m just playing…”

It’s all very well being in love, always yearning for our partner, but maybe, during a chance meeting in a lift, the new 6th-floor neighbor makes a good impression on us. It’s no use, when he says hello to us or catches our eye, we feel a tingling in our tummy. And this is what we imagine, not to mention the other scenarios we come up with, the minute we are feeling down during the day. Yes, yearning for someone other than your partner is possible, and it doesn’t mean you have to act upon this urge. If flirting is synonymous with playing with fire, then a thought remains just a thought. And if we throw ourselves into the flames, we move on to another game…

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

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So we’ve understood that love isn’t simple, but this doesn’t mean we can’t manage our relationships better on a day-to-day basis. Discover our 10 tips for a successful relationship and whether you should tell a friend she’s being cheated on.

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Katie, M.

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Wengood's playlist

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  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
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  6. White FlagDido
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  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
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  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
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  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
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  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
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  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
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  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
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  19. WingsBirdy
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  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
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