Narcissists are slippery snakes and love hiding their true intentions from those they prey on, so, what better way to do so than via text message? It’s true that texts offer us the possibility to manipulate people’s emotions, be evasive, lie to them, and toy with them, all whilst remaining at a safe distance. Here are some examples of narcissist text messages that should alert you.
How narcissistic people text
Recognizing a narcissistic people also involves analyzing their language, which is very often punctuated with superlatives and typical phrases, such as the following:
- "Look at everything I do for you"
- "I love you like I've never loved anyone before".
- "I'm unlucky in my relationships"
- "I never did that, I never said that"
- "It's your fault you get into these states, not mine"
Their communication patterns are unclear: they like to keep an element of ambiguity in everything they say to you in order to deliberately confuse you. For example, they will purposely change the conversation and focus on things other than what you are saying to distract you, or they will spontaneously leave the conversation on the pretext of an emergency.
What is a typical text message a narcissist sends you to get your attention?
1) ‘I think you’re my soulmate’
If you’ve only been chatting with your potential love interest for a few days, and he suddenly becomes the perfect Disney Prince by professing his feelings for you, this should be a huge red flag. Feelings for someone develop over time and can’t simply be switched on after 7 days of talking to someone. Although some people catch feelings quicker than others, moving at lightning speed will never lead to anything sincere.
2) ‘I want to be the only person you talk to’
Narcissists won’t be shy in attempting to establish control over their victims. In short, like the vicious predators they are, they like to mark their territory and hate sharing those they prey on. Plus, to draw people in hook line and sinker, they’ll attempt to flatter them and push to put a label on the relationship as soon as possible in an attempt to scare off potential love rivals.
3) ‘You’re so kind, beautiful, amazing, etc…’
If you know anything about narcissists, you’ll no doubt be aware that they use compliments as a means of control. They love flattering people they want to lure in and will often tell people everything they want to hear. These devious parasites are always very over the top in their text messages, so you could also see tons of emojis too. 💋❤️🔥🤤
4) Then… ‘You’re crazy’
Once the shower of compliments dries up, a narcissist will eventually reveal their dark side and tell you how crazy you are, especially when you start to get suspicious of their behavior. Gaslighting is one of their favorite tactics, and they won’t hesitate to use it as soon as they feel their victim is firmly in place and under the thumb.
>>> Read; Why you should run if a guy claims his ex was crazy
5) ‘I’d never cheat on you’
Here, a narcissistic person will lay the groundwork and attempt to convince their texting buddy that they are different to everyone else. They’ll attempt to make people believe that they have the utmost respect for them, and would never dream of hurting them. After all, they certainly aren’t above spinning a few lies in order to keep their true motives under wraps.
6) ‘You have trust issues’
This is a narcissist’s go-to move whenever the person they are texting starts to ask too many questions. Rather than being honest and clearing the air, instead, they opt for a defensive approach and try to turn the situation around. That’s right, they’ll make themselves out to be innocent victims… The nerve!
7) ‘Don’t wear that dress, it makes you look fat’
We mustn’t forget that these manipulators will never pass up on an opportunity to put you down. Ultimately, they’ll do and say absolutely anything necessary to break your confidence and wear you down. For them, no comment or attack is too nasty.
8) ‘You’re a bad person’
Changing the narrative is also something these leeches excel at! Now, their huge egos and lack of empathy mean that they are incapable of acknowledging the damage they cause, plus they get a kick out of making those they prey on feel bad. There’s no doubt about it, they love toying with our emotions and distorting the truth.
9) ‘You’d be nothing without me’
This is something an experienced narcissist will say when they feel that their victim is slipping out of their grasp. In order to remain in the driving seat, they won’t hesitate to make scary claims about you being too weak to face the world without them.
10) ‘No one would ever believe you’
Sowing seeds of doubt is an essential part of the manipulation process, and ultimately leads to the shattering of any confidence that victims have left.
What happens when you stop texting a narcissist?
Cutting all communication with them is a sign of you taking control of the situation, and will therefore anger a narcissist. If you stop texting them, their ego will take a brutal hit, and will make them even more determined to win you back by any means possible. Now, normal people would just give up and get the message (sorry for the pun) when you stop replying, however, these devious bullies will bombard you with even more attempts to communicate, meaning you should expect hundreds of calls from them. In their eyes, you are their plaything, and they'll be the one to end things, not you.
Do narcissists ever text first?
Narcissistic people may take the initiative to text victims, but this depends on a number of factors, such as their specific personality, preferred communication style, and the context of the relationship. Here are some possible scenarios:
- Manipulative initiation: Narcissists are often experts at manipulating and controlling others. They may therefore initiate contact via text in order to maintain their hold on the victim. This may be to ask for something, to re-establish their power, or to play on the victim's emotions.
- Need for attention: They have a constant need for attention and admiration. They may therefore send messages to attract their victims' attention and obtain a response. They may seek to provoke interaction or obtain praise or compliments.
- Power play: They can also use text messages as a means of control and domination. They may intentionally ignore the victim's messages, and respond late or ambiguously, in order to create uncertainty and anxiety in the victim.
- Maintaining a hold: They may keep in touch with their victims to maintain a hold on them. They may alternate between kind messages and abusive behavior to confuse and keep the victim under their influence.
Why do narcissists ignore texts?
A narcissist may ignore our text messages for many reasons, all linked to their constant need to feel superior and admired. Ignoring our messages may be a control tactic to maintain their power over others and reinforce their fragile self-esteem. By ignoring us, they may seek to elicit a reaction of insecurity or need for approval on our part, thus placing them at the center of attention. Moreover, ignoring us may be a way for them to protect themselves from potential rejection or abandonment. By shutting themselves off emotionally, they avoid facing up to their own vulnerabilities and revealing their true dependence on others. Ignorance can also be a manifestation of their genuine disinterest in others, as their main preoccupation is often focused on themselves and their own gratification.
Editor’s opinion - How to respond to a narcissist's text - Silence is the best response
When you suddenly realize that the person you are talking to is a raging manipulator, the best thing to do is to sever all ties with them. If any of the above examples ring a bell for you, then you should instantly block the person’s number and completely cut communication with them. This degree of manipulation is terrifying and will only bring you pain in the long run. Although narcissists have weaknesses
, they can never really be disarmed and certainly aren’t willing to change, even if it is to preserve your mental health.
🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy… Let’s do it here and now!
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