I Don’t Have Any Close Friends, But Is That A Problem?

Over time, acquaintances have replaced real friends

In the schoolyard, making friends was as simple as introducing ourselves. A quick handshake, a shared laugh, and we were inseparable—at least until high school ended. Back then, friendships felt effortless and unbreakable.

Then came college, with its massive lecture halls filled with hundreds of students whose names I never remembered. Socializing became more challenging, and the once-natural connections were replaced by silence and isolation. As we grow up, we tend to develop a certain mistrust toward others. Whether it’s rivalry, fear of rejection, or difficulty opening up, forging meaningful ties becomes harder.

Today, as an adult, I don’t have “best friends” that feel like family, but I’m not exactly lonely either. I have people to chat with at work, at the coffee shop, or during my hobbies. Plus, I never spend Saturday nights alone, crying into a tub of ice cream. My life is full of acquaintances, but I sometimes wonder if that’s enough.

>>> Discover the 10 signs your friendships aren’t healthy

Whose fault is it? Are my actions to blame?

For some people, the lack of friendships stems from their own behavior. They may grumble, judge others, or focus too much on small details, making them hard to approach. If this sounds familiar, the good news is that these habits can be worked on with self-awareness and effort.

Others may have no close friends by choice. Introverted or solitary individuals often prefer their own company. They enjoy doing things their own way—shopping alone, dining solo, or watching movies without interruptions. For them, this independence is fulfilling.

However, if you find yourself struggling to connect with others due to shyness or low self-esteem, know that you’re not alone. Therapies and self-help strategies can help you build confidence and improve your social skills.

>>> Read up on our tips to make new friends as an adult

Growing up means creating your own life

As adults, we often realize that it’s okay to distance ourselves from others and focus on our own lives. Everyone has their own responsibilities, careers, and families. The secret to happiness lies in relying on yourself and following your own desires.

I’ve chosen to settle in a city I love, pursue a job that aligns with my skills, and engage in hobbies that bring me joy. This approach has helped me avoid disappointment and focus on what truly matters. Thanks to my partner and close family, I’m never truly alone, even if I don’t have a large circle of friends. Life is unpredictable, and it’s okay if the people you meet today aren’t the ones you’ll see tomorrow.

>>> Find out what I do when I feel lonely

What are the effects of not having friends? - Feeling lonely is bad for your health

Whether intentional or not, the absence of close social interactions can negatively impact your mental and physical health. Studies show that people feel less lonely and stressed when they have someone to share their lives with. Difficult times are easier to endure when you have friends to lean on, and social connections can even lead to a longer, healthier life.

Here’s how friendships benefit your well-being:

• Reduced stress: Sharing your worries with friends can help you feel supported and less overwhelmed.
• Improved health: Social interactions have been linked to lower risks of heart disease, cancer, and other illnesses.
• Enhanced happiness: Spending time with loved ones boosts your mood and contributes to a sense of fulfillment.
• Better cognitive function: Engaging in conversations and activities with friends keeps your mind sharp.

Even occasional outings with friends can make a big difference in your overall happiness and quality of life.

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