How To Pick Up A Modern Day Man: Dare To Make The First Move

Last updated by Katie M.

In this day and age, hitting on a man is totally normal, but that doesn't mean it’s an easy feat for everyone. From misreading the signals to feeling like you are making a fool out of yourself; there are lots of reasons that hold us back from sealing the deal with our crush. We’ve put together some very effective tips on how to flirt and land the man of your dreams. So, what if you just went for it and put the moves on him?

How To Pick Up A Modern Day Man: Dare To Make The First Move
Contents: 

Women have long assumed a passive role that often prevents us from making the first move when it comes to dating. The time has come for us to be modern, strong, confident and assertive women!

How to successfully flirt nowadays: 4 Golden rules to follow

1. Be assertive (but not too assertive)

When we notice a man we like, we rarely dare to approach him, like that, directly. Indeed, going to tell someone that we want to see him again, that he’s caught our eye, is a bit like getting naked, it's not easy, and it's scary. But, even if your self-confidence takes a hit, and you get turned down, you can be proud to have dared to take the first step. On the other hand, don't be too overconfident, either. There is nothing worse than coming off cocky and big-headed.

2. Do the groundwork beforehand

Before telling your crush that you like them and that you want to see them again, anticipate things a little, because this will help you avoid disappointment and allow you to relax. Make eye contact, smile, flirt, be tactile, in short, try to create contact. The rest will be easier if you feel that you are both on the same wavelength, and it will also be a gentler method of approach if you want to hit on a shy man.

>>> You might like this article: 6 tips to definitively overcome your shyness

3. Be yourself and stay natural

To seduce does not mean to become a femme fatale or the ideal fantasy of every man. Spontaneity and naturalness are formulas that always work, and that's how you'll be more confident. If you play a role, it will be less simple for you.

4. Animate the conversation

This is the most difficult thing to do when you want to seduce a man. If you flirt by text message or online, you have to avoid being evasive and if you are face to face, you don't chase away embarrassing silences with endless rambling. Show that you are a brilliant and intelligent person. Forget about the "what's up?" or "what do you do for a living?", but rather talk about your passions, about your latest vacation etc. It's simple but effective, so when you talk about yourself, an unassuming "what about you?" will keep the conversation going.

>>> Why not check out: How to recognize you're in a toxic relationship

What to say to pick up a guy?

Guys like to have their egos flattered, this is therefore an important point to keep in mind when you want to go about seducing your crush. Here, comment on his natural charm, his eyes, or his smile. You should also focus on targeted phrases, like "you have a really nice smile" or "it's so cute that dimple on your chin". Cute details that aren’t too invasive will do the trick here. There are multiple approaches to seducing men, and one of them is to be direct, without detours. In fact, some guys appreciate this approach and believe it is unique to bold ladies. To adopt this tactic, approach your crush and say "I want to get to know you", and "Hi, do you want to have a drink?" At least your intentions will be crystal clear.

Editor's note - I'm strong, but that doesn’t mean I don’t get turned down

We often hesitate when it comes to flirting because we are afraid of being rejected. It is hurtful, it is painful, and therefore we avoid taking the risk, although it’s a shame because nothing comes of it. Throughout, life we can't please everyone, that's how it is! But that doesn't mean that you are not good enough, it's just that the reciprocity is not there, so be enterprising, you only have things to gain!

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

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