"Love is when difference no longer separates". When he says white, I say black. He's a dog person and I prefer cats. If being alike guaranteed a long-lasting relationship, my man and I would be left out in the cold and probably wouldn't last longer than a week together. We’re worlds apart, yet madly in love and use our differences to form a great team, to make discoveries, to gain in organization and even in open-mindedness! The absence of common points is not a flaw, and here’s the proof.
If Meghan Markle hadn't married Prince Harry, but instead went for an actor like herself, their story wouldn't have been so cute and would probably have gone unnoticed in the stratosphere. Many couples prove that differences are a strength, and my relationship isn't any different.
When the passion fades, we start to notice what really matters in a relationship. In addition to his beautiful eyes and his devastating humor, I realize that his reassuring nature calms my omnipresent stress, or that he is a fine cook whereas I am more gifted at eating. I bring my touch of diplomacy to the table, and he’s there to organize things. Thanks to our differences, the strengths of one partner compensate for the weaknesses of the other, and this is real teamwork! Imagine a household made up of two angry or two shy people, it just wouldn’t work... By being efficient and balanced, we pull each other up.
New food, new music groups or new hobbies, I learn something new every day! Well, although I'm not 100% converted yet, I can legitimately say that thanks to him, I can now bear listening to hard rock. Differences are more sources of discussion than sources of conflict or reasons for divorce. As long as you are not closed-minded, expose your own point of view and listen to your partners too.
It's true, our lack of common ground sometimes poses a problem; especially when we sit at the table. He can't live without meat, and I can. He has never understood the usefulness of soup, and I drink it regularly. But each problem has its solution! It simply requires organization. It is also valid for the choice of vacation location, in turn, we make concessions, we step out of our comfort zone, and we are delighted to make each other happy, because the next time, the roles will be reversed!
Be careful not to confuse soulmate and double. I don't want my other half and I to become one to the point that our entourage does not even differentiate us. We are a couple, but two people with differences. Differences that must be cultivated because they make me the person I am. Down-to-earth, while he is a great dreamer, organized, while he leaves room for surprise... It is in passing for his character traits, different from mine, that I fell under his spell! After all, only narcissists would like to go out with their clone.
> Read; am I too demanding of my partner? <
Any love coach will tell you; a relationship that is built on difference requires a real capacity for openness, adaptation, understanding and acceptance. In addition to spending time with me and showering me with attention, my man accepts to see the world through my eyes and understands that I have a different way of functioning than he does... and he has no problem with that. I think we have the ultimate proof that he loves me. And without love, none of this would have been possible!
If, as the saying goes, opposites attract, it still seems preferable to have a few common interests. Without seeking absolute mimicry, having endless discussions, and fiery debates, in a word, a stimulating and fruitful exchange allows you to cultivate your relationship. Living privileged moments around your passions is just as rewarding.
In fact, when the first signs of routine appear, if you have no common ground, nothing that can cement the relationship, it quickly becomes problematic. Whilst having absolutely nothing in common might not seem like a huge issue, in the beginning, eventually, it will drive a wedge between you and your partner. That’s right, you’ll soon find that you have nothing to talk about and aren’t exactly excited at the prospect of spending quality time together doing one of your partner’s favorite activities.
Editor's opinion: Having things in common reassures us!Every relationship is beautifully unique, just like the factors that impact its chances for success. Whilst we don't have to love spending our weekends watching football with our partner, it is important to compromise when it comes to love. I'm not saying you have to do everything together and be attached at the hip, but, having some common ground is essential for a love story to last in the long run. 🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now! #BornToBeMe |
Hopefully, now you are proud of your differences, and that your couple is stronger for it!
Article presented by Katie M.
🌻 Discover the world through my eyes.
I know the real fear of work. I suffered from it for a long time, but I’m happy to say that today I’m cured. It’s an illness that can make others smile, as you can easily be seen as lazy. However, it’s not the case for people suffering from ergophobia, the fear of work. Where does this fear come from? How can it be treated? All will be explained.
When it comes to people with narcissistic personality disorder, it is often difficult to distinguish the truth from the common misconceptions. In this precise case, I thought it was about time we took a closer look at their psyche and inner workings of their consciousness, by addressing whether they are privy to their condition. After all, people with such an intense sense of entitlement and serious lack of empathy must realize that they are narcissistic; right? Well, in fact, the answer to that is not exactly black and white, so let’s take a look at why.
Narcissists are known for having a certain way with words, these folks certainly use this talent to their advantage, that's to say, to sink their teeth into their victims. Now, these calculating crooks don't use their gift of the gab to build people up, no, of course, they don't! Instead, the opposite is true, they use their smoothness to tear down their victims, destroy their confidence, and isolate them from their loved ones, all whilst brainwashing them and pretending to be the real victim. Wow, I don't know about you, but to me, that seems like a lot of work! Now, as skillful narcissists are, they can't completely dissimulate their true intentions and at points, their tongue betrays them, as you'll soon see in the following quotes. Here's what they typically say to bring people down...
There you have it, the nature vs nurture debate is back, only this time I want to focus it on those deviously manipulative personalities we refer to as narcissists. Now, evidently these folks get bad press and rightly so because they are often at the root of plenty of harm, but is it really their fault? Can they really be blamed for their terrifying and perhaps inherent traits, or are they simply just products and in this case victims of their environments? Let’s settle this debate once and for all and figure out how and when this disorder becomes apparent. So, are you born a narcissist or is it developed?
From their lack of empathy to their scarily manipulative and controlling streak, narcissists arguably display despicable behavior that simply can’t be condoned. Once these people get their claws into a victim, they become ruthless and have absolutely no regard for the effects their behavior may have on their mental health. Now, as with many syndromes, nothing is black and white with these types of personality disorders. In fact, there are certainly many inaccurate theories regarding their relationship with remorse regarding their actions, and that’s why I’m here to set the record straight.
If you’ve ever given online dating a whirl, the chances are you’ve been ghosted by someone. Now, for those of you who are unaware of this practice, it involves putting a sudden end to a relationship without offering any form of explanation. If I had to estimate how many times this has happened to me, I’d say there are definitely over 10 guys out there who owe me an explanation as to why they suddenly disappeared off the face of the earth… However, all the confusion and short-lived heartbreak has taught me that ghosters always seem to reappear at one time or another.
Who hasn’t had a crush in their life? You know, it’s when you fall for someone and have feelings for them even though you don’t really know them. I’m one of those people who have had lots of crushes, and sometimes I’ve even admitted my feelings. In fact, a recent example was just before I started my relationship with my current partner. I offloaded what I was feeling all of a sudden… I’ll tell you why I did it and how to go about it.
Never invited to parties, never listened to or solicited... It feels like you're just an ordinary person, who is pushed aside and has no value. If this is the case, we often end up coming to the sad conclusion that "nobody likes us! But, why do we think this? Now, this thought does not reflect reality, it hides deeper issues that need to be worked on to detach ourselves from this heavy feeling. Everyone deserves to be loved, including us!
I’ll be the first to admit that my stubbornness means I’m not exactly the most willing person when it comes to uttering the words ‘I’m sorry’, but I always push through my pride; although unfortunately, the same can’t be said for narcissists... Indeed, people who suffer from this personality disorder will simply never hold their hands up and accept responsibility for their actions, despite how deeply they’ve hurt your feelings. 😱 You know the idiom getting blood from a stone, right? Well, when it comes to apologies from these toxic personalities, nothing is more appropriate, and here are 6 reasons why!
Kissing is a deeply intimate act, and although in popular culture it is often classed as only being worthy of first base, it does in fact go way beyond that toxic evaluation. We have no doubt all had at least one lingering kiss that we’ll never forget; one which left all of our senses tingling and hungry for more. 💏 Well, that memorable smooch left us reminiscing because it was sincere and meant something. In short, it encapsulated love and romance, which are two things that narcissists are quite simply incapable of feeling.
