Getting Your Act Together Is All Very Well, But Where Do You Start?

Last updated by Lauren Hart

A few months ago, I went through a period in my life when I felt the need to get my act together. I think we can all go through this kind of moment when we feel the need to change certain things in our lives. But where do you start? How do you get your act together? Now that I’ve started to take stock, I’m going to give you my advice.

Getting Your Act Together Is All Very Well, But Where Do You Start?

Start by… finding meaning

Let’s not put the cart before the horse. If you want to get your life back on track, you need to start by looking inward and using introspection, otherwise you can quickly feel lost. To do this, you need to ask yourself this key question: why do I want to get my act together? 🤔 This helps us to understand what we’re unsatisfied with and to see if we are aligned with our deepest values and desires. So we can do a big rethink and a small one to establish small changes. Whatever the case, a clear reason helps us to give more meaning to our actions.

💬
For example, I couldn’t stand having constant pain in my body: back pain, shoulder pain, leg pain, etc. I didn’t want to suffer anymore, and that was a real source of motivation.

When you know why you want to change, you have a clear goal. So you’re more likely to commit to change, even when it’s difficult, and you feel like going back into your comfort zone. Manage to hang in there and persevere to overcome the difficulties you encounter 💪.

👋 You may be interested in this article: How can good self-esteem help you overcome difficult situations?

Start by… defining your goals

Now that it’s a little less hazy, we need to establish precise goals. Yes, it’s like preparing for a trip: you need to know where you’re going. With objectives, you have a guideline, and above all, you move forward step by step. It’s no good trying to do everything quickly. By defining clear goals, you take your time more ⏳.

👉 Let me retake my example. Initially, I wasn’t sure where to start to ease my pain, so I saw my doctor. From there, I was able to have physiotherapy and realized that I needed to get back into sport. My goals were as follows:

  • Find a suitable sport that I enjoy,
  • Make an appointment for an introduction,
  • Register,
  • Set up a specific day when I go to the gym,
  • Go at least once a week.

Of course, it’s a small way of getting my act together. Other people need to find meaning in their lives and take more steps to achieve their change.

Start by… taking time for yourself

Whatever your family or romantic situation, taking charge of your life means learning to make time for yourself. I’m in a relationship and I don’t have any children, but I still made very little time for myself until I became aware of it. You need to give yourself quality time, time that allows you to recharge your batteries and take a step back.

To do this, you need to sort things out and organize your time better. This often means being less of a perfectionist or being less lazy. I’m affected by both: either I spend far too much time doing something because I want it to be perfect, or I put everything off until the next day and scroll on my phone for hours 😅... It’s all about getting rid of bad habits so that you can make time for change. So you can do a sport, meditate, have a body treatment, learn a new activity, cook to eat more healthily, etc. In any case, it’s enabled me to set up a sports session at least once a week 🏃‍♀️!

>>> Read; The 12 steps to follow if you want a fresh start

Start by… finding support

Getting your act together is a process that sometimes takes time. You don’t wake up completely transformed overnight. There are ups and downs, and that’s normal and human. You need to forgive yourself and celebrate the small victories. Every time I’ve gone out to do sport, I’ve savored my achievement to the full. However, even if you’ve done all the previous steps perfectly, you can still lose your momentum and quickly fall back into your old habits. So don’t hesitate to get support, either from those around you or from a professional. I thought about taking on a sports coach, but I preferred to take yoga classes to move more gently. Above all, avoiding pain was motivation enough for me 😪.

We don’t all react in the same way, and we don’t all have the same goals, so we shouldn’t compare ourselves. Whether you decide to take charge of your life for small changes or to pull a 180, you need to recognize when you need help. What’s more, starting by looking for support can be the best way to get your foot in the door ;).

Editor’s insight: Every step is a victory

Don’t forget, that every step, however small, is a victory in itself. If the road to getting back on track sometimes seems winding, don’t hesitate to look for a guide. A psychologist can be that lighthouse in the storm, helping you navigate through life’s challenges. So why not make an appointment? After all, the greatest journey always begins with the first step. Smile, breathe, and move forward at your own pace. You’re not alone, our psychologists are waiting for you.

🤗 Understanding yourself, accepting yourself, being happy... It’s here and now!
#BornToBeMe

Be sure to check these articles out too;

Article presented by Lauren Hart

Writing is a beautiful means of expression that I cannot do without. It has allowed me to channel my hypersensitivity, plus I love writing about psychology and personal development. For me, self-understanding is the best way to move forward!

Read our latest articles here:

Are Narcissists Born Or Made? - Let's Settle The Debate

There you have it, the nature vs nurture debate is back, only this time I want to focus it on those deviously manipulative personalities we refer to as narcissists. Now, evidently these folks get bad press and rightly so because they are often at the root of plenty of harm, but is it really their fault? Can they really be blamed for their terrifying and perhaps inherent traits, or are they simply just products and in this case victims of their environments? Let’s settle this debate once and for all and figure out how and when this disorder becomes apparent. So, are you born a narcissist or is it developed?

Do Narcissists Regret Hurting People?

From their lack of empathy to their scarily manipulative and controlling streak, narcissists arguably display despicable behavior that simply can’t be condoned. Once these people get their claws into a victim, they become ruthless and have absolutely no regard for the effects their behavior may have on their mental health. Now, as with many syndromes, nothing is black and white with these types of personality disorders. In fact, there are certainly many inaccurate theories regarding their relationship with remorse regarding their actions, and that’s why I’m here to set the record straight.

A Guide On How To Deal With Narcissist Silent Treatment Guide📕

If you've ever been involved with a narcissist, you'll know exactly how dangerous and vindictive they can be. Now, they won't use physical violence to break their victims down, although the tactics they use are just as painful and debilitating. These slippery characters operate under the shadow of darkness and use subtle mind games and tactics in order to exert a maximum amount of control and manipulation over their prey. You have no doubt already guessed it, but in case you haven't yet, the silent treatment is a narcissist's go-to tactic when it comes to punishing their victims and taking control of them. Find out here why these abusers use this method and how to deal with it.

8 Reasons Why Ghosters Always Come Back 👻

If you’ve ever given online dating a whirl, the chances are you’ve been ghosted by someone. Now, for those of you who are unaware of this practice, it involves putting a sudden end to a relationship without offering any form of explanation. If I had to estimate how many times this has happened to me, I’d say there are definitely over 10 guys out there who owe me an explanation as to why they suddenly disappeared off the face of the earth… However, all the confusion and short-lived heartbreak has taught me that ghosters always seem to reappear at one time or another.

Should You Really Confess Your Feelings?

Who hasn’t had a crush in their life? You know, it’s when you fall for someone and have feelings for them even though you don’t really know them. I’m one of those people who have had lots of crushes, and sometimes I’ve even admitted my feelings. In fact, a recent example was just before I started my relationship with my current partner. I offloaded what I was feeling all of a sudden… I’ll tell you why I did it and how to go about it.

How To Get Revenge On A Narcissist?

Narcissistic abuse is one of the most horrific challenges anyone can ever go through in life, but that’s not to say that their reign of terror will last forever. Evidently, breaking the cycle of abuse isn’t exactly straightforward, however, once the discard phase has been activated and victims realize that they can walk away with their heads held high, the revenge phase can commence 😈. Unsurprisingly, getting even with a raging egocentric narcissist needs to be carefully planned, but ironically, their self-centered personalities expose to many axes of revenge, which will evidently really get to them…

Are Narcissists Lonely?

Loneliness is one of society’s biggest enemies, and none of us are exempt from it, not even the most devilish of narcissists out there. In fact, throughout the Coronavirus pandemic, 36% of Americans claimed that they have never felt lonelier, which sets a scary benchmark for the wider population 😔. Now, lots of us would no doubt immediately assume that narcissists are too independent and strong-willed to feel alone, however, the truth is they are often the biggest victims of loneliness, yet simply have trouble expressing their inner malaise.

"Nobody Likes Me"

Never invited to parties, never listened to or solicited... It feels like you're just an ordinary person, who is pushed aside and has no value. If this is the case, we often end up coming to the sad conclusion that "nobody likes us! But, why do we think this? Now, this thought does not reflect reality, it hides deeper issues that need to be worked on to detach ourselves from this heavy feeling. Everyone deserves to be loved, including us!

6 Reasons Why Narcissists Never Apologize - They Hate Saying Sorry

I’ll be the first to admit that my stubbornness means I’m not exactly the most willing person when it comes to uttering the words ‘I’m sorry’, but I always push through my pride; although unfortunately, the same can’t be said for narcissists... Indeed, people who suffer from this personality disorder will simply never hold their hands up and accept responsibility for their actions, despite how deeply they’ve hurt your feelings. 😱 You know the idiom getting blood from a stone, right? Well, when it comes to apologies from these toxic personalities, nothing is more appropriate, and here are 6 reasons why!

Why Do I Feel Bad When People Don’t Message Me Back?

Friday night rolls around and after a hard week you were expecting to have a drink with a girlfriend, but she seems to have left you hanging on read... To make matters worse (and the humiliation?) you even saw the little typing sign appear, yet you never received a reply. Well, if that’s the case, obviously you or your "how about a drink tonight?" didn’t deserve an answer. Let’s take a look at why some people don't reply to messages, and why when someone doesn't reply to your text, this makes us feel so bad.



Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:17
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:17
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41

How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack