No Sex In A Relationship - Could It Make Me And My Partner Happier?

Last updated by Katie M.

What are people in a sexless relationship called? Are they roommates? Or even platonic lovers? For me and for many others; sex is the foundation of any relationship, but being the curious person that I am, finding an answer to this question seemed like a challenge I couldn't turn down. Thinking back to the early days of my relationship, going 3 days with no action between the sheets was virtually impossible, yet, many couples say putting a stop to love making saved them. This got me thinking and after reading more about sexual abstinence, it got me thinking about the benefits of giving the bed springs a break.

No Sex In A Relationship - Could It Make Me And My Partner Happier?
Contents: 

It’s with a heavy heart that I’m writing this. I’m not counting or anything (well, that’s a blatant lie) but let’s just say it’s been a month since I’ve seen any action with my partner. All physical contact is off limits, there's no kissing, cuddling or anything else for that matter. All I can say right now is that it’s definitely an experience! It’s not that we’re no longer attracted to each other, on the contrary, we just wanted to give this a shot and discover the benefits that sexual abstinence could bring to our relationship.

I have no sex drive, and it's ruining my relationship! But, is it really?

Can a relationship survive without making love? That’s the question! As someone that has given a sex ban a try, I can definitely say that the benefits are plentiful. Although the first few days of celibacy are tough, things get easier as time progresses. Many couples have given this a shot, and most of them are in fact completely satisfied with the results.

Sex

If you take love making out of the equation, you’ll definitely find you have way more time on your hands to do as you please. Taking a break for my usual sex life taught me a lot more about my partner and showed me how talented he actually was in other domains far away from the bedroom.

The frustration means the best is yet to come

We all know that routine only ever has a negative impact on our libidos, especially if we are in a long-term relationship. When it comes to love making, the optimists of the world advise keeping things fairly regular and even go as far as suggesting you turn down certain propositions with tact to get the desire running high. Refusing to give in to your body’s urges only means your enjoyment will be intensified the next time round. Building desire and tension is guaranteed to help you relight the fire between you. 

Couple

Trust me, if you follow this advice, you won’t be able to keep your hands off each other for too long!

At the beginning of the article, you can probably see that I was fully embracing my new sexual abstinence life choice, however as time went on, I started missing the intimacy! These insights have led me to my final conclusion.

The experiment is definitely wearing on my patience...

Although the experience taught me a lot about myself and my desires, I can safely say that abstinence definitely makes life less exciting. My moods are often closely related to how satisfied I am in the bedroom, too. Regular love making is said to improve sleep quality too because it helps us relax and zone out. Plus, it’s way more interesting than doing the dishes...

Hug

I almost forgot to mention hugs! Whether brief or drawn out, hugs are the secret to releasing a multitude of endorphins and make us feel so much better. Science never gets it wrong!

What to do if no sex in a relationship is getting you down?

Whilst a sex break can do the world of good for certain couples, that is, when both partners are willing to give the experiment a try, for others, it will tear them apart. If your partner has suddenly gone off love making and this is leaving you frustrated, here are 5 things you can do about it.

  • 1) Ask them for an explanation - Getting to the root of the issue, if there is one, is always a useful first step.
  • 2) Listen - Following on from the first point, this is the only logical sequence to reviving the flame. Plus, perhaps it will bring things up that you hadn’t even considered.
  • 3) Spend more time together - Quality time will increase natural moments of tenderness between you.
  • 4) Be more romantic - Hold hands, kiss, cuddle, and then see where it leads…
  • 5) Respect your partner’s choices - Our libidos are never linear and naturally experiences highs and lows, depending on our moods and stress levels, for example.

Editor's opinion - No sex in a relationship doesn't have to signal the end

We are all different when it comes to our sex drives, there are those that can't go 2 days without stripping off for some hanky-panky, and there are those that flee sex. That being said, not having sex doesn't have to be a death sentence for your relationship, in fact, it can even be an exciting opportunity for you. That's to say, to get to know your partner on a deeper and more emotional level. After all, sex isn't everything, but a pure connection is!

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

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Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:17
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:19
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41


"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." 

- Oscar Wilde


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