Can You Have A Healthy Relationship With A Narcissist?

Last updated by Katie M.

I’ve always been very open with my dating history, so if you’ve read some of my other articles, you’ll probably already know that, none of my relationships have ever fulfilled me, or even made me feel good about myself. In fact, since dating my most recent partner, who was by the way a raging narcissist, I’ve decided that I need to take a break from love, and instead, spend more time on finding myself. How did I get to this point? Well, when I was with my ex, no matter how hard I tried, our love disintegrated, well at least for me, it did. I can now firmly say that all the tears, arguments, and pain have taught me that loving someone with narcissistic tendencies will only ever end in disaster, and I’m about to share why.

Can You Have A Healthy Relationship With A Narcissist?
Contents:

Walking away from my psychologically abusive ex was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do in my adult life. It took all the courage and strength that I had, but despite how terrifying I found the prospect of moving on, I knew that if I wanted to preserve my mental health, it was necessary. That leads me to where I am today, yep, that’s right, I’m the self-titled Bridget Jones of my friendship group, and surprisingly I couldn’t be happier! So, I bet you’re wondering why I’ve decided to pick at old wounds, right? Well, now that I feel stronger than ever, I want to warn other empaths, like myself, about the dangers of narcissistic abuse.

5 Reasons why a relationship with a narcissist will only ever be toxic

A healthy relationship is a foreign concept to them because…

1) Your intentions are different

I don’t want to sound brutal, or even too pessimistic, but dating a narcissist will never work out because their intentions are impure. These folks are unfortunately incapable of loving anyone but themselves, and will only ever feign interest in people they believe could be useful to them, or fun to manipulate. Their feelings are never genuine, which means they’ll have plenty of leeway to play with you as they so please. Whilst their partners are looking for love and a true connection, these abusive parasites are looking for someone whom they can emotionally abuse.

2) You’ll never be important for a narcissist

The harsh truth is that these personalities only care about one thing, and that’s themselves. No matter what you do, or how many efforts you make, this will never change and because they lack empathy, they’ll never even take you into consideration for a second. Now, that’s not to say that from time to time they won’t turn on the charm in an effort to convince you that you are special to them. They may resort to this tactic, but, in reality, it’s just another example of their gaslighting and love bombing behavior, which helps them go undetected, and to get their own way.

3) The control becomes unbearable

You might believe that you have strong boundaries in place, but remember that no challenge is too intimidating for your narcissistic partner. In fact, the more challenging something seems, the more determined they become to prove their victims wrong, and that includes your parameters to protect yourself. They will eventually decide who you can see, who you can talk to, and in the most extreme cases, what you can wear. Even people with good self-esteem will find themselves falling victim to their manipulation.

4) The concessions will be unequal

For any relationship to work, sacrifices need to be made on both sides, or should I say any healthy relationship? When it comes to these toxic personalities, their strong sense of self and grandiose egos mean they are totally unwilling, and perhaps even incapable, of compromising. In short, they believe they are always right, and that they have the best ideas; so why would they ever change their minds on anything?

5) Communication is impossible

Good news, bad news, and everything in between will leave these toxic personalities indifferent. In fact, discussing feelings and emotions with these folks is a real trigger for them, and often brings out the worst in them. Knowing what’s going on in their head is mission impossible, which is why they are so unpredictable and dangerous.

Is it possible to live with a narcissist and be happy?

Living with someone who has a narcissistic personality is a big ask and can be very challenging on a daily basis. If your living arrangements mean you are in close proximity to a narcissist, it’s likely that you have already fallen victim to their abusive ways, which evidently makes being happy a complicated task. When these vicious creatures feel safe, this is when they are at their worst. When they feel comfortable in their environment, they really believe they can lay down the law and do as they please. Plus, in the privacy of their own homes, they can inflict even more pain and emotional trauma on their victims. Behind closed doors, they'll insult, abuse, criticize, and make the lives of their victims miserable and unbearable...

Is it lonely to be married to a narcissist?

Being married to a narcissist can be an incredibly lonely experience. Narcissists are often self-centered and lack empathy for others, which can leave their spouse feeling unimportant and unappreciated. They also tend to manipulate and control those around them, leaving their spouse feeling trapped and isolated. In addition, the constant need for validation and admiration from the narcissistic partner can leave their spouse feeling drained and emotionally depleted. Despite being in a relationship, the spouse of a narcissist may feel incredibly alone and unsupported, as the narcissist's focus is always on themselves. Overall, being married to a narcissist can be a lonely and emotionally exhausting experience.

Editor’s opinion — It will only ever end in tears

No matter how much we like to convince ourselves of it being false, narcissists will never change, and are unable to give us the love and care many of us are looking for. They are self-serving, opportunity grabbers who are interested in founding healthy relationships. Now, we have to give them credit for their acting talents. But, regardless of how convincing they are with regard to their feelings, we need to keep in mind that they are master manipulators, and will say anything to get their own way…

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

Be sure to check out these articles too;

Article presented by Katie M.

Discover the world through my eyes.

Read our latest articles here:

Between Bliss And Suffering: Who Is The Child-Like Woman?

But who is she really? The child-like woman. It’s all in the name, but not quite fully, either. Admittedly, the child-like woman has become an adult, because we all go through that, but she hasn’t “grown up”. So she juggles all her facets: cute and sexy, fresh and annoying. The child-like woman is above all a subject of fantasy, for better or for worse. Let’s explain.

6 Examples Of Moving Farewell Letters, It’s Time To Open Your Heart

"Love stories usually end badly." As you know as well as Les Rita Mitsoukos, love isn’t a direct path to eternity. Sometimes it disappears from our hearts, leaving a great emptiness, if not fierce hatred. That’s when it’s time to say goodbye, and a letter can sometimes be the most effective way of saying exactly how you feel and explaining why you’re leaving. Here are 6 examples of farewell letters, to say goodbye, ciao, or bye-bye to a loved one, but also to a friend or, more sadly, to a loved one who has died.

How Do You Know A Narcissist Is Cheating?

Narcissism is wholly incompatible with healthy relationships, which goes some way in explaining why people with this personality disorder always believe the grass is greener elsewhere. Indeed, fidelity isn’t something they excel in and adds to their exhaustive list of weaknesses alongside their love of manipulation and dishonesty. However, they are so cunning and crafty that catching them out and confirming your intuitions is no easy feat. To make things easier for you, here are the 10 signs you need to look out for if you believe your narcissistic man is cheating on you.

6 Reasons Why Narcissists Never Apologize - They Hate Saying Sorry

I’ll be the first to admit that my stubbornness means I’m not exactly the most willing person when it comes to uttering the words ‘I’m sorry’, but I always push through my pride; although unfortunately, the same can’t be said for narcissists... Indeed, people who suffer from this personality disorder will simply never hold their hands up and accept responsibility for their actions, despite how deeply they’ve hurt your feelings. You know the idiom getting blood from a stone, right? Well, when it comes to apologies from these toxic personalities, nothing is more appropriate, and here are 6 reasons why!

Do Narcissists Always Come Back?

You're probably thinking that once a narcissist has upped sticks and fled, he'll never dare to show his face again, however, quite the opposite is true. The reality is that these folks are like bad smells, there's no getting rid of them quickly, therefore regardless of all the pain, hurt, and trauma they've put their victims through, they'll always make a comeback, just to prove that they are still in control. In fact, no matter how much time has passed, these torturous monsters will always eventually rear their ugly heads, just to get in that one last vicious blow. Discover which 10 circumstances they'll decide to show up in their exes' lives.

How Does A Narcissist React When They Can’t Control You?

You probably know by now that narcissists only ever look for one thing and one thing only; and that’s control! Whether in their personal or professional life, folks with this personality disorder need to be in the driving seat and the one calling the shots, otherwise all hell breaks loose. Although their cunning and manipulative nature means they are often hard to escape, it is still possible to turn the tables on them and take the upper hand. Yet, you’ll need a thick skin to do so because when they feel their power slipping away, they become even more dangerous and abusive; here’s how they react when that happens.

10 Signs The Narcissist Discarding Phase Has Been Activated

The most important thing to understand when dealing with a narcissist is that their reign of terror won't last forever. Now, whilst their torment underway, it will no doubt be one of the most harrowing things you can mentally go through. However, when the abuser decides they've had enough of you, they'll halt their horrific abuse in a heartbeat and look for someone else. People with narcissistic personality disorders are constantly on the lookout for new prey and when they find someone who fills their criteria, they'll move into the discarding phase of their plan. After all, they aren't very eco-friendly, their motto is out with the old, in with the new!

What Does A Narcissist Hate?

Narcissists are experts in the field of duping and manipulating their victims, yes, that’s right they are true chameleons, which explains why many of them often go undetected. Their behavior is definitely dangerous and means we definitely need to figure out what makes them tick and, in this particular case, what they hate. Understanding what these entitled personalities dislike is one of the keys to best exposing them and freeing their victims from their grip. Now, we all get angry for one reason or another, but people with this personality disorder have different triggers related to the things they despise.

10 Reasons Why Your Ex Slept With Someone Else After Your Breakup

We are all unique individuals, and we, therefore, go about handling breakups and the other obstacles life throws our way, differently. Now, when it comes to breakups, there are those of us that almost become celibate and decide that they can't stand the idea of getting to know anyone ever again. Then, on the other hand, there are those that fill their phones with dating apps and jump from one one-night stand to the next. This second scenario may seem harmless, but once we dig a little deeper into the repercussions of it, we soon realize that sleeping with other people so freshly out of a relationship masks troubling sentiments of unhappiness and uneasiness.

Can A Narcissist Be Faithful?

Narcissists often get bad press, and although many of us try to see the best in most people, in their case, it can be extremely difficult to find. The truth is, folks with this personality disorder don’t exactly have many redeeming qualities that could potentially help to excuse and explain their borderline evil behavior. Plus, when it comes to love, their lack of empathy means they have next to no loyalty, which means many of them often end up cheating on their partners. Ladies, if you are in a relationship with a narcissist, the alarm bells ought to be truly deafening.

Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Let It BE - Beatles Awaken2Now (See Thru Oppositional 2’s)
    3:54
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:17
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:19
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41


"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." 

- Oscar Wilde


How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack