I’m Afraid Of Sleeping Away From Home: My Nights From Hell

Last updated by Katie M.

I’m going on vacation soon, I’m really looking forward to it, but there’s one small problem, I’m unable to sleep outside my home. Between the fear of the dark and the fear of the unknown, far from my usual cocoon, my nights turn into a nightmare, without me even closing my eyes!

I’m Afraid Of Sleeping Away From Home: My Nights From Hell

My nights on red high alert: why I can’t sleep anywhere else

I arrive in a hotel room, at my holiday destination, or at my friends’ country home, and I’m thrilled, but when night falls, and it’s time to go to bed, I turn into a bedroom survivalist. 🤯 I survey, I watch, I observe. The door double-locked, ok. Light switch, bedside lamp, or night light nearby, ok. Check under the bed, ok. Three trips to the bathroom, ok. And after all that, I’m still unable to sleep. It doesn’t matter whether I’ve had a 4-hour journey, an hour and a half in the pool, or 6 glasses of wine and a good dinner, I can’t get to sleep.

To begin with, I'm scared of the dark and when it’s dark in an environment that’s unknown to me, it’s even more worrying. The slightest noise turns my stomach, and profound silence stresses me out. So I start thinking about all those people who get killed on holiday, you know, those people in TV series! 😱 What happens is that I’m hypervigilant. Well, the left half of my brain is hypervigilant.

👉 It’s a reflex inherited from our ancestors when they were susceptible to attack during the night by animals or other humans. If I reason with myself, I know that there’s little chance of me being attacked in this charming little beachside flat, but my survival instinct prefers to keep an eye out and so do I.

And when the next day comes

Sometimes when it’s 5.30 or 6 am, and I’m still not asleep, when the first light of day appears behind the shutters, I feel reassured and grab a few moments of sleep. Not enough. The day after the first night away isn’t the worst, it’s the day after that’s more complicated. My brain’s hypervigilance is gradually extinguished, and I finally fall asleep, no more reassured, but exhausted… literally!

How to sleep better away from home?

There aren’t really any solutions to make sleeping away from home easier, but at best, I’ve put a few tips in place:

  • 👉 I take my own pillow. The smell, the feel, the fabric, the softness, I know everything about my own pillow, and it has a way of reassuring my brain.
  • 👉 I take a night light with me. It’s one of the first things I bought to make my time in the maternity ward easier (it was one of my must-haves for a good post-natal experience). I don’t know how I did it before, but since I’ve used night lights, I take them whenever I have to sleep away from home. If I wake up in a panic, I turn it on for a while and I can get back to sleep more easily, reassured by the soft light.
  • 👉 I watch a TV series or listen to the radio. So yes, I know that the blue light emitted by screens isn’t good for your sleep as it prevents the production of melatonin, but watching a TV series on my phone is a good way for me to have light and a busy mind. The only condition is that you have an understanding partner!

If you also have trouble sleeping anywhere other than your home, you should know that it’s no big deal 😉. You need to tell yourself that because if you worry for several days before the big night, you’ll never be able to enjoy your days and bedtime might turn into an anxiety attackSet up your own reassurance techniques. If you have to look under the bed, at the back of the cupboards or put a chair in front of the door, do it and remind yourself that night can seem bad, but is still restful. And even if you don’t believe it at the time, you’ll end up falling asleep!

Editor’s note: where does this fear come from?

This fear of sleeping away from home may reflect inner insecurity or difficulty letting go outside a familiar and secure environment. If this fear has persisted since childhood, it may be interesting to find the cause, perhaps a fear of abandonment by sleeping somewhere else? Determining the origin will help to overcome it. Cognitive and behavioral therapies, CBTs, give very good results, so don’t hesitate to contact a psychologist.

🤗 Understanding yourself, accepting yourself, being happy... It’s here and now!
#BornToBeMe

Be sure to check out these articles too;

Article presented by Katie M.

🌻 Discover the world through my eyes.

Read our latest articles here:

Is It Possible To Find Your Genius Zone To Be Effective At Work?

Nowadays, we all aspire to have a job that makes sense, where we naturally feel good, and where we work without difficulty. To achieve this, we need to draw on our natural skills to find our “genius zone”. This would enable us to work effortlessly, while being in harmony with ourselves. Sounds like a dream, right? I was curious to find out more about this concept launched by psychologist Gay Hendricks, so I’ll tell you all about it! Let’s see if you really can find your genius zone!

Amorality: True Freedom Or Pure Selfishness?

I often roll my eyes when I see influencers unpacking hundreds of Shein parcels or tourists disrespecting the local traditions of the country they’re visiting. What do both have in common? Their amorality. If you don’t know what that is, I’ll explain what it is and how it can be harmful not to have an ethical compass. Let’s get started!

Is My Mom A Narcissist? 10 Things Narcissistic Mothers Do

Do you remember back in the day when you were a teen and constantly fought with your parents, and in particular your mom? Whether it was because you wanted to stay out past your curfew or chose to parade around in your new miniskirt, many of us have faced constant battles with our mothers. However, for those of us dealing with a narcissistic mom, the problems don’t stop when we finish puberty, no, in fact, they stick with us throughout our lives and make it impossible for us to establish a healthy relationship with the person who brought us into the world. Now, if the scenarios below seem all too familiar, then you might just have been raised by a narcissist.

10 Examples Of Narcissist Text Messages: How They Blow Up Your Phone

Narcissists definitely move with the times, which is why many of them constantly troll dating sites for new victims. Chatting with a manipulator of this magnitude can be a rollercoaster experience, with dizzying heights that might lead you to believe you are in love, to gut-wrenching lows which will make you question your worth. 📱 For any raving narcissist, text message exchanges are a great way to reel in victims and follow through with their master plans for ultimate control over them. Are you texting someone you suspect to be a narcissist? The examples below could confirm your suspicions.

10 Weird Things Narcissists Do Sexually - Romance Is Dead

As with many things in life, narcissists also have unhealthy relationships with sex and treat it as nothing more than a self-gratifying activity. After all, manipulation, control, and emotional abuse are their so-called trusty weapons that they hide behind in most circumstances, so why wouldn’t they call on them in the bedroom too? The bottom line is people with this personality disorder are used to getting what they want and will only ever put themselves and their pleasure first, which doesn’t bode well for a healthy sex life. 🙈 Discover the weird things narcissists do in the bedroom and what you should do if you are involved with one.

5 Scary Things A Narcissist Smear Campaign Involves

We hear so much about these emotional abusers in every walk of life that we are sometimes so overloaded with information regarding them, meaning we often miss the red flags that, in hindsight, seem blatantly obvious. These vindictive manipulators often use smear campaigns as a way of getting back at their victims and villainizing them publicly. That's right, these evil campaigns are an effective method for them to change the narrative of the abuse, and to present themselves as victims, when in reality they are the perpetrators of the terror.

Do Narcissists Enjoy Kissing?

Kissing is a deeply intimate act, and although in popular culture it is often classed as only being worthy of first base, it does in fact go way beyond that toxic evaluation. We have no doubt all had at least one lingering kiss that we’ll never forget; one which left all of our senses tingling and hungry for more. 💏 Well, that memorable smooch left us reminiscing because it was sincere and meant something. In short, it encapsulated love and romance, which are two things that narcissists are quite simply incapable of feeling.

How Do You Know A Narcissist Is Cheating?

Narcissism is wholly incompatible with healthy relationships, which goes some way in explaining why people with this personality disorder always believe the grass is greener elsewhere. Indeed, fidelity isn’t something they excel in and adds to their exhaustive list of weaknesses alongside their love of manipulation and dishonesty. 💔 However, they are so cunning and crafty that catching them out and confirming your intuitions is no easy feat. To make things easier for you, here are the 10 signs you need to look out for if you believe your narcissistic man is cheating on you.

Can A Narcissist Become Obsessed With Someone?

Now, narcissists are known for demonstrating a worrying lack of empathy along with deviously manipulative traits, oh, and before I forget to mention it, HUGE egos too 😈. Yes, that’s right, they love spending hours looking in the mirror and being told how fabulous they are. To put it in other words, people with this personality disorder are firmly in love with themselves, to the point of being totally obsessed with their so-called perfection, but the question is, can they put their self-admiration aside enough to become preoccupied with someone else? If, on the other hand, you're looking to get a narcissist hooked on you, you're in the right place with these tips.

How Narcissists Treat Their Exes

Walking away and definitively closing the door on your relationship with a narcissistic ex-partner is one of the most emotionally draining challenges you can face. After all, these manipulative bullies are never willing to just let bygones be bygones, and always want to have the final word after the break-down of a relationship 😈. Besides, when narcissists get dumped, their inner demon raises its ugly head and becomes determined to (metaphorically) destroy their ex-partner.



Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:17
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:17
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41

How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack