I Feel Useless: Why Do I Feel Like This? How Do I Cope?

Last updated by Lauren Hart

There have been times in my life when I’ve felt useless, too much, out of place... Whether at work or even in general. I felt like I wasn’t contributing anything to anyone. Fortunately, I managed to combat this feeling, thanks in particular to therapy. I understood where it was coming from, and I managed to get rid of this negative emotion. Today, I’m sharing with you how to move on.

I Feel Useless: Why Do I Feel Like This? How Do I Cope?

Why have I come to feel useless?

“I’ve got no purpose.” I think that at one time or another, any human being can feel useless and for various reasons (for example: not having the right skills 🫣). Nevertheless, if there are other things associated with it, if we feel empty, depressed, and have the feeling that we’re worthless and useless, we need to dig deeper and understand what’s behind it all. We can come to feel useless because we:

  • 👉 Compare ourselves to others: Unfortunately, our society pushes us to compare ourselves all the time, so when faced with the successes of others, we can quickly feel useless...
  • 👉 Suffer from a lack of self-esteem: I’m raising my hand loud and clear... When you have a self-confidence deficit, you constantly feel that you’re not up to scratch and that you’re not worth anything.
  • 👉 Have no plans: If you don’t have clear goals or objectives in life, you can feel useless, which has happened to me several times. Having plans gives meaning to our lives and allows us to excel.
  • 👉 Suffer from social isolation: There was a period in my life when I had little contact with others. Withdrawal and isolation push us into this feeling of uselessness because we feel like we don’t count for anyone.
  • 👉 Replay past failures: We’ve taken on board the fact that failure is shameful, so we end up feeling useless. Failures end up defining our value when they’re just a normal part of learning.
  • 👉 Have had traumas: Some experiences are real emotional shocks, and it’s difficult to rebuild positively after going through them, so you end up feeling useless.
  • 👉 Experience difficulties with our mental health: Something much deeper may be lurking behind the feeling of uselessness, it may be a symptom of depression or the characterization of an anxiety disorder.

Personally, I didn’t feel good for a long time, I really felt like I was good for nothing 🥹... With time, I realized that there were several causes: lack of confidence, trauma, and anxiety. Taking a step back and understanding what’s behind this feeling is essential if we’re to move forward, but it’s not the only solution.

How do you get over this feeling of uselessness?

Feeling useless is a cumbersome and devastating emotion 💔. However, what we have to come to understand is that it’s only a perception. In reality, we have a value, and we need to differentiate between the way we’re seen and the way we really are. We need to distance ourselves from this kind of harmful feeling, but that’s not all.

Learn to see yourself differently

Indeed, in order to overcome our feelings of uselessness, we also need to learn to identify our negative thoughts. At times when things really weren’t going well, I had cognitive distortions, I always saw the glass as half empty, rather than half full 🥃. Our thoughts can be heavily impacted by our mood and bring us down, which is why we need to detach ourselves from them.

I also realized something else: that it was time to love myself and see my worth. During therapy, I learned self-compassion and to see myself as my own best friend. We all need to look at ourselves with kindness and forgive our mistakes in order to move forward.

Explore new things

It’s also vital to do some soul-searching and ask yourself the right questions: what do we like doing? What makes us happy? Are there talents or skills that we don’t use enough?... This internal analysis can help us discover aspects of ourselves that we may be neglecting. We can also think about exploring things we’ve never done before, like volunteering. Yes, there are simple actions that are extremely gratifying and that give real meaning to our lives. It gives us a new perspective on the value we can bring to others 🌍.

Surround yourself with loving people

We mustn’t forget to take a look at the relationship aspect of our lives. When I was at my lowest ebb, I was single and felt that no one would love me. I didn’t see much of my friends and family, which added to my feeling of uselessness. But we’re often much more appreciated than we think. So don’t hesitate to talk to those close to you and surround yourself with people who mean well. Yes, there are sometimes toxic relationships that drag us down, in which case we sort them out to get back up stronger 💪.

It's important to remember that you’re not useless, and that you have a role to play in this world 🤕. We all have unique talents and qualities, every human being has value. It’s possible to transform that feeling of uselessness, believe me.

Editor’s note: A strong sign not to be neglected

If you feel worthless, it’s a warning sign not to be ignored. 🚨 A psychologist can help you understand these feelings and their origins, and work on your self-esteem. Together, you can change this negative perception and regain a more positive view of yourself. Don’t wait, take the first step towards well-being and make an appointment. Be certain that you have value and that you deserve to feel good. 💪🙂💖

🤗 Understanding yourself, accepting yourself, being happy... It’s here and now!


Be sure to check out these articles too;

Article presented by Lauren Hart

Writing is a beautiful means of expression that I cannot do without. It has allowed me to channel my hypersensitivity, plus I love writing about psychology and personal development. For me, self-understanding is the best way to move forward!

Read our latest articles here:

The Unbearable Habit Of Cutting People Off, Let’s Put A Stop To It!

If there’s one thing I don’t like, it’s getting cut off when I’m talking. I get the impression that what I’m saying is of no importance to the person in front of me. So yes, maybe the person we’re talking to is afraid of forgetting their train of thought and rushes the words out of their mouth, but still. The icing on the cake? It’s when there’s no excuse and it happens all the time. What an unbearable habit cutting people off is!

Friendship Test: How Well Do You Know Your Friends?

One day I learned that one in two friendships wasn’t reciprocal. This figure is quite disturbing, but in the end, it’s not that surprising. When you become an adult, your priorities change, and sometimes you drift apart or make new friends... and forget others! To find out where you stand with your friendships or to get to know each other better, there’s a very effective method: 50 questions to get to know each other by heart and (re)connect.

How Can We Identify Repetitive Patterns And Get Out Of Them?

For a long time, I had the feeling that I was repeating the same mistakes. For example, on more than one occasion, I missed out on a career opportunity. All because I was convinced I was useless… Unfortunately, I bet I’m not the only one to have observed this kind of repetitive pattern. This kind of cycle is vicious, so how do you identify it and get out of it? Now that I’ve learned how to work on it, I’ll explain.

Is Not Giving A Damn The Secret To Happiness? Really?

I often get told to take things less to heart. I admit that as a hypersensitive person, I put my heart and soul into everything. Perhaps a little too much because that tends to generate anxiety. So in the end, is not giving a damn about anything the secret to happiness? Well, I’ve tried to delve into the subject with my research, and it’s not quite as simple as that. Here are some explanations.

Forbidden Love Story

“Deny thy father and refuse thy name; or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love, and I’ll no longer be a Montague.” I think everyone’s guessed where this quote comes from! It is, of course, Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. I’ve always loved this story of forbidden love, and I’m not the only one because this play has stood the test of time. On the other hand, I find it much less enjoyable to experience forbidden love. You don’t know whether it’s better to give up on it or get burnt... I’ll tell you all about it.

I Hate Having My Photo Taken, But Why?

One of my hobbies is photography. You’d think then that I’d be very comfortable in front of the camera, but no! The reason I do photography is to get behind the camera and take photos of other people. Ok, I sometimes take self-portraits, but as soon as someone else takes my photo, I hate it. I know I’m not the only one who feels this way, which is why I’ve decided to talk to you about it today.

Get to know me! 🌻

Our February Challenge: The Month Of Self-Love And Pampering

When we think of February, do we think... icy feet 😬? Okay, it's not particularly known for that (even though it's true). No, when we think of February, Valentine's Day comes to mind. However, this celebration feels too commercial, putting pressure on couples and making singles feel guilty about being solo. So, instead, we thought we could create a little self-care challenge for you.

Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist


  1. Only LoveBen Howard
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
  4. Beautiful DayU2
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
  6. White FlagDido
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
  15. With Or Without YouU2
  16. HelloAdele
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
  19. WingsBirdy
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar

How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack