I'm Incapable Of Apologizing, But Is That A Crime?

Last updated by Katie M.

It doesn't exactly bother me if my housemate has to take a cold shower because I used all the hot water, or if I accidentally stained a coworker’s white shirt with my morning coffee. I understand their resentment, but I can’t apologize. Is it my ego or the desire to be honest that prevents me from asking for forgiveness?

I'm Incapable Of Apologizing, But Is That A Crime?

“Oh, it seems to me, that sorry seems to be the hardest word… ♫”  Acknowledging your wrongdoings is a sign of greatness and apologizing is proof of humility. People who ask for forgiveness easily are wise and brave, I understand. No matter how serious my mistake, I just can’t apologize… But I have good excuses!

Why I can never admit my wrongdoings

Apologizing is an insult to my pride

No matter how many times I say, “I’m sorry”, “Forgive me”, “Please don’t be mad at me”, it always sounds to me like, “I’m so mean, do you want me to grovel at your feet?” It’s just us, so admit it, not saying sorry gives such a satisfying sense of superiority! Some people look sorry to even exist, but let it be known that I’m not one of them. Whoever can make me feel guilty for existing and for being me hasn’t been born yet. Although there are codes of decorum, from the moment we live in a community, we expose ourselves to the risk that others will hurt us, even unconsciously. I have my pride; a fiery temperament, and I will never renounce my personality.

>>> Find out why I feel empty inside

I’d rather be real than a hypocrite

I remember the last time I said sorry. One of my coworkers had missed the bus because we were talking, and the conversation went on forever. It was more a combination of factors than a malicious, premeditated act, but the end result was the same… So, to maintain the peace, I said those famous words. Forced and coerced. And I regretfully thought that few apologies are truly sincere and spontaneous.

Underneath my proud exterior, I’d much rather be someone who is stubborn but honest, who sticks to their guns and who doesn’t question their behavior, than someone who makes empty apologies. To all those smooth-talking hypocrites who look you straight in the eye and say sorry when they don’t mean a word of it and couldn’t care less about you… An apology is sacred! Either you mean it, or you don’t say it. Put yourself in the shoes of someone you’ve hurt before saying something you don’t mean. There’s nothing worse than hearing an “I’m sorry” that oozes irony.

I don’t comfort others in their misfortune

It’s a sad fact that humans are not known for being kind to their fellow man. So, when someone has been hurt, pushed around or offended, you’d best run for your life! Don’t see this as a sign of cowardice, just a strategy to protect yourself. If I could guarantee that my apologies would be accepted, I would hesitate much less. But it seems you can’t forgive everything, so… I don’t want to put the ball in their court.

By evading the issue so as not to entertain a vicious game of revenge and resentment, I also spare those I’ve wronged. By not saying sorry, I don’t pity them and I don’t comfort them in their misfortune. “Oh, poor thing, I’ve stained your shirt, your life is ruined” … no! I’d rather give them the impression that it’s not a big deal and hope that they will react with dignity.

>>> Discover what hypersensitive people are great at

Editor's opinion: Become aware of it and change this harmful behavior

‘Admitting weakness is impossible, apologizing would be like saying ‘I’m showing you what I’m lacking in’, «explains the psychoanalyst Nicole Fabre*. Some people, more serious cases, are impeded, viscerally incapable of apologizing. According to the doctor in psychology and psychoanalyst Moussa Nabati, this mental block or “inner impediment” is linked to a feeling of badly managed guilt. They prefer to shut themselves off in denial rather than accept their wrongdoing and the harm they may have caused to others.

This behavior can be harmful, as the psychoanalyst Nicole Fabre explains, “We can tell ourselves that we’ve always been like that, but we’re wrong. Those who don’t want to change will end up isolating themselves and being rejected.” If you’ve recognized this behavior in yourself or in one of your loved ones, become aware of it, as change can only come from within. Learn to manage your guilt and love yourself more.

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

More great content;

Article presented by Katie M.

🌻 Discover the world through my eyes.

Read our latest articles here:

Fountain Woman And Squirting

When we talk about ejaculation, let’s not deny that we almost always think of sperm and who it belongs to. It has to be said that the fountain woman still isn’t discussed enough. Because of the taboo? Perhaps. Out of jealousy? Why not? Ignorance? Not for much longer in any case... Far from being a fantasy, and especially far from being pornographic, the phenomenon of the fountain woman is still, and above all, a good opportunity to focus on our bodies, to let go and take lots (and lots) of pleasure.

I Spend Far Too Much, How Can I Cut Back? 7 Tips!

Every month it’s the same thing: I end up going overdrawn. The reason’s simple, I spend too much. I spend too much on food, leisure activities, clothes, and decoration, not to mention bills and other compulsory costs. However much I earn, it’s melting like snow in the sun, and it’s harder to endure than you might think, so I need to cut back as quickly as possible. But how can I do it?

The Temperamental Type

I’ve never described myself as temperamental. But I’ve never had a problem associating that word with my father. As I get older, I’m afraid of becoming like him, so will I adopt the same behavior as him? In fact, how can we define a temperamental person? How can we recognize one? What are their origins? So many questions that I asked myself and for which I found my answers that I’ll share with you. Let’s explain.

What Is Thalassophobia?

When I was a little girl, I remember often having a dream where I was going to the pool 🌊. But this pool had no bottom, and I would see creatures that terrorized me. As I grew up, I realized that this was a manifestation of my thalassophobia. Now, I don't think about this phobia as much as I did when I was younger. And, understanding that you suffer from this fear is not easy, just as curing it isn’t. Here are a few insights into the fear of the deep blue sea.

How To Get Revenge On A Narcissist?

Narcissistic abuse is one of the most horrific challenges anyone can ever go through in life, but that’s not to say that their reign of terror will last forever. Evidently, breaking the cycle of abuse isn’t exactly straightforward, however, once the discard phase has been activated and victims realize that they can walk away with their heads held high, the revenge phase can commence 😈. Unsurprisingly, getting even with a raging egocentric narcissist needs to be carefully planned, but ironically, their self-centered personalities expose to many axes of revenge, which will evidently really get to them…

Is Your Mom A Narcissist?

Do you remember back in the day when you were a teen and constantly fought with your parents, and in particular your mom? Whether it was because you wanted to stay out past your curfew or chose to parade around in your new miniskirt, many of us have faced constant battles with our mothers. However, for those of us dealing with a narcissistic mom, the problems don’t stop when we finish puberty, no, in fact, they stick with us throughout our lives and make it impossible for us to establish a healthy relationship with the person who brought us into the world. Now, if the scenarios below seem all too familiar, then you might just have been raised by a narcissist.

What Is The 333 Rule For Anxiety And Panic Attacks? It's A Soothing Technique

I want to be completely open and honest with you, so let’s get started. Anxiety has dominated my life for the past 5 years and has been at the root of countless panic attacks and bouts of intense stress 😟. You’ve probably guessed it, but it has had a devastating impact on my mental health and has therefore changed my life for the worst. Now, I’m not here for a pity party, but instead of focusing on the negative sides of this condition, I want to share the most effective tip I’ve found when it comes to feeling less anxious and reducing panic attacks; so without further ado, let’s take a look at the 3-3-3 rule.

Self-Love Checklist: 30 Daily Actions + 20 Affirmations To Make Yourself Feel Better

Life can be a bit of a rollercoaster, and whilst I'm sure we'd all agree that at times we are lucky enough to experience dizzying highs, at other points, we all go through gut-wrenching lows that really do bring us crashing down. Feeling good about ourselves 365 days a year is certainly a big ask, but it's definitely not impossible, and I'm proof of that! 💪 Psst, lean in, I want to let you into a secret! Whenever I'm feeling down or when my anxiety spins out of control, I take a look at my self-love checklist for inspiration and decide that it's time to make myself feel better about things. Plus, you'll often find me repeating a few of my favorite affirmations to myself.

Are Narcissists Insecure?

There is no denying that narcissistic personalities display some deeply worrying and disturbing traits, but what if these devious traits were just a means of protection? What if they were in fact a complete facade, fabricated to keep people away, in the hope of hiding their deepest darkest insecurities? 😱 After all, everyone has weak spots, even the most confident and put together of people, so why wouldn’t a narcissist deal with the same niggling doubts as everyone else? It's time we got to the bottom of this and discovered why these folks are so insecure.

What Career Should You Choose If You Lack Self-Confidence?

Introverted, discreet, lacking in self-confidence... These were the words that often appeared on my school reports. Unsurprisingly, they still characterize me just as much, but they’re generally badly perceived in the professional world. We’re always told that you need to believe in yourself if you don’t want to be eaten alive, but it’s a long-term process. So personally, I preferred to choose a career that suited my personality. What kinds of jobs might suit someone with low self-confidence? Let me explain.

Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:15
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:19
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41

How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack