Iāve had a crush on someone at work before. Honestly, if I hadnāt found out later that he was in a relationship, Iād have gone all out to seduce him. Except that we all know the āNo sex at workā rule, which means that itās a bad idea to sleep with a colleague, or worse, your boss! Is it really that dangerous a game? What do you risk if youāre caught in the act? Iāll explain it all to you (yes, I did my homework before going for it)!
In many peopleās minds, love and work are incompatible, it would be like trying to mix oil and water š¬. Yes, some managers and superiors already see being on first-name terms at work as something negative, so imagine what a sexual or romantic relationship would be like! But why is this badly perceived? For the company, love at work is the best way to disrupt employee productivity. Itās true that whether everythingās going well or not, our attention will be turned to this matter rather than to our daily tasks š...
Except that we spend an average of 7 to 8 hours a day working, 5 days a week š¤Æ. This is a far cry from the 8-hour week, which would theoretically be good for our mental health. In short, we spend most of our time at work, so itās not surprising we have crushes on a colleague or even our boss.
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Not so impossible According to a 2018 Ipsos survey, 14% of married couples have formed in the workplace! When it comes to sex, 35% of people have already had sex with someone in their work environment. Yes, whoād have thought? š¤«... |
š In terms of productivity, many psychologists, including LoĆÆck Roche, author of the book āCupid at Workā, agree that itās a productivity booster and that it can be a source of creativity and extra motivation! And besides, itās in the most innovative companies that there are the most intimate relationships... Coincidence? I donāt think so!
Well, itās all well and good to say that we have the therapists on our side, but isnāt this boldness at work a dangerous game in the eyes of the law š? Although in the US, companies can ban relationships and apply sanctions.
ā ļø It can be a dangerous game if you decide to have sex in the workplace. Yes, if you get caught, you risk facing disciplinary action or even dismissal... Sure, it may be a great fantasy, but the downside can be harsh if youāre caught in the act.
Even if itās tempting, avoid sex at your workplace!
Even worse, the employer may consider that we do our tasks badly because of this fling. For example: if we take a slightly longer lunch break to have lunch with our colleague, this could be sanctioned... If, on top of that, we have a toxic manager on our backs, thereās a good chance that heāll take advantage of this excuse to make our lives even harder. So how do we make it right š£?
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Yes, technically, itās possible to have a relationship at work. Nevertheless, itās not a smooth ride... To avoid it getting out of hand and becoming a dangerous game where you get burnt, there are 4 golden rules to respect:
1 - Be lucid: You need to take a step back and ask yourself the right questions in order to assess all the risks: Is it worth it? Will we be able to manage it emotionally? Is there a subordinate relationship? Will it harm professional relationships?
2 - Be discreet: This is the most important rule. You need to make sure that no one knows about it. The saying goes āa secret life is a happy lifeā, this is even more true when it comes to sex or love at work...
3 - Remain professional: No matter what happens in the intimate relationship, we must leave the private where it is, that is, not during our working hours! It mustnāt influence our judgement or our abilities...
4 - Be honest: If the time for fooling around is over and the relationship is serious, then youāll have to talk about it! Itās like announcing a pregnancy to your employer, you have to do it, because after a while, itāll show š . But you should only do it if itās 100% serious!
You canāt say that it will allow you not to get caught or have a nasty rumor behind your back š¤. Nevertheless, it helps to limit the damage! Because no matter how hard you try to hold back, sometimes the attraction is so strong that you let yourself get caught. Is it worth it šÆļø? Itās up to you, but in the meantime, you have all the keys in hand so that itās not a (too) dangerous game.
Editorās note: You only live once!Having a relationship with a colleague or your boss can be very thrilling and exciting, but as Lauren reminds us, be careful not to get caught. Itās up to you to take responsibility. If you feel like this is the love of your life, go for it, donāt think about it and listen to your heart, after all, you only live once. And then youāll find a new job if itās awkward. If your romantic situation is problematic, if the same patterns repeat themselves, make an appointment with a psychologist. Together youāll understand where the pattern comes from and how to put in place new habits to be happier. š¤ Understanding yourself, accepting yourself, being happy... Itās here and now! #BornToBeMe |
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Article presented by Lauren Hart
Writing is a beautiful means of expression that I cannot do without. It has allowed me to channel my hypersensitivity, plus I love writing about psychology and personal development. For me, self-understanding is the best way to move forward!
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