I’m Too Spontaneous, How Do I Manage It?

A freer state of mind

When you’re a spontaneous person, it’s your instincts that act. I think it’s great not to let your thoughts get in the way and just run with your feelings. In comparison, I’m much more afraid of making a decision, however small it is. Whereas, extroverted and spontaneous people will have much less trouble taking action 💪. They’re freer people who don’t let their fears get in the way, unlike introverts like me.

Acting before thinking

That’s right, why think when you can act? The typical kind of thinking my friend would do. Being spontaneous is mostly a quality, my friend spends less time procrastinating, she goes straight into the action. She often breaks her routine, she knows how to say no, she tries new experiences, she completes her projects much more quickly, etc. In short, she manages to move forward 🙌! However, sometimes this character trait is detrimental to her, especially in social situations…

Why pay attention to your spontaneity?

Where this quality can turn into a flaw is in a social context. I always speak with the example of my best friend in mind, I know it’s impossible for her to not say what’s going through her mind. That’s how impulsive people work, they say out loud what they think. The train of thought runs at the same time as the spoken word. Except that not everything is good to say, you can hurt other people by saying out loud what you think with no filter. I’ve seen my friend make some pretty big blunders before, revealing a secret, for example. Oops, 😶!

As much as those around her forgive her, it’s not the case for everyone. Words that go beyond thoughts can cause problems in the professional world, for instance. That’s why it’s important to learn to control your spontaneity in certain situations.

How to be less spontaneous?

Indeed, acting or speaking before thinking can be tricky. The first thing to do to be a bit less spontaneous is to be aware of this character trait. Usually, those closest to you are the first to describe your behavior and actions, so listen to them! If they tell you that you’re impulsive, it’s interesting to do some introspection to understand how you work.

Slow down

From this point on, it will be easier to determine which moments can trigger stronger reactions, in order to better manage your emotions. Indeed, stress can exacerbate spontaneity, and this is what makes us lose our grip even more! To achieve calm, meditation activities help to slow down the pace and take a time out.

🧘‍♀️ Learning to pause isn’t impossible. If I can regulate my thought flow, I know that my friend can control her spontaneity too.

Don’t forget to be yourself

Above all, don’t feel guilty about being yourself. I’d like to get out of my comfort zone as spontaneous people do, maybe you do too if you’re reading this article! This character trait is like any other, it has its share of advantages and disadvantages. But as Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken” 😉. As long as it doesn’t hurt others or cause you problems, go for it!

The neuroscience behind spontaneous behavior

Recent research reveals fascinating insights into how spontaneous decisions occur in our brains. The impulse to act quickly comes from the limbic system, while our prefrontal cortex handles the careful planning we sometimes need to override. Understanding this internal dance helps us better manage our spontaneous tendencies.

Spontaneous people often have stronger connections between their emotional and action centers. This biological wiring explains why some individuals naturally leap into action while others pause to consider consequences. Neither approach is inherently better - each has its place in different situations.

Harnessing spontaneity in professional settings

The workplace often presents unique challenges for spontaneous individuals. While quick thinking and rapid response can be valuable assets, learning to channel this energy productively becomes crucial for career success. Creative fields particularly benefit from spontaneous thinking, while analytical roles might require more measured responses.

Many successful leaders have learned to balance their spontaneous nature with strategic thinking. They create systems that allow for both quick decisions when appropriate and deeper reflection when necessary. This hybrid approach often leads to more dynamic and effective leadership.

The relationship between anxiety and over-planning

Sometimes, what we perceive as careful planning is actually anxiety in disguise. The fear of making mistakes can lead us to over-analyze situations that might benefit from more spontaneous responses. Learning to distinguish between necessary caution and excessive worry helps strike a better balance.

Embracing controlled spontaneity can actually reduce anxiety levels. When we allow ourselves small moments of unplanned action, we build confidence in our ability to handle unexpected situations. This gradual exposure helps develop a healthier relationship with uncertainty.

Be sure to check out these articles too;

• Why can I never the positive?
• Why do I constantly need attention?
• Why do I always feel guilty?