Our Solutions And Tips To Overcoming Vaginismus

Contrary to popular belief vaginismus, is in fact not caused because of an anatomical malformation and therefore isn’t physical problem. Instead, the root of the problem stems from your mind and the internal worries you might have related to sex. It’s an irrational fear of penetration that causes these spasms and leads to tight contraction of the muscles in the vagina. Although this may sound intimidating, there’s no need to panic because many solutions exist to avoid this reaction.

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Vaginismus isn’t exactly very well-known and isn’t a topic of conversation may people feel comfortable talking about. It’s a well-hidden subject that is shrouded under the taboos of sexuality, yet, believe it or not, it’s one of the simplest obstacles to overcome. Two key methods exist when it comes to establishing fulfilling sexuality, and these are:

  1. Physiotherapy methods
  2. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

Even today, women suffering from vaginismus wait years before consulting anyone. Although, only a few sessions are needed to resolve the problem and restore your full sexual abilities. The fear of penetration and of the pain it could cause, can indeed be the consequence of several factors, including;

  • A lack of knowledge of the genital system.
  • Misconceptions, for example my vagina is too narrow, not deep enough, etc...
  • Moral or religious constraints that have prevented discovery of this intimate area.

Here are 5 tips to help you feel more comfortable with intimacy

1. Healthcare professionals are your best allies

A Physiotherapist specialized in pelvic area will be able to help you discover your anatomy.

2. Get to know your vagina

It will be a bit like going back to biology classes with a visual-based anatomy, but it’s an important step. Then, afterwards, you’ll need to explore your own body in front of a mirror. The goal of these exercises is to get back in touch with reality and to throw away your preconceived ideas.

3. Relax the muscles of your vagina

Through a few relaxation exercises, you will learn how to loosen your perineum to ease the exploration of your body.

4. Gently tame your body

If necessary, a physiotherapist can also advise you to use vaginal dilators, which are presented in the form of a hygienic tampon. The use of dilators will help to demonstrate in a progressive and controlled manner that the vagina is completely designed to accommodate a penis without pain.

5. The psycho-sexual solution to chase away your anxieties

Cognitive behavioral therapy is a useful method when it comes to overcoming your worries and anxieties. This therapy consists of modifying women's automatic thoughts, therefore acting on their fears and resulting behaviors. In short, it’s a kind of mental reprogramming to free the mind and body!

What are the consequences if vaginismus goes untreated?

  • Irregular gynecological check-up: Gynecological follow-ups becomes a torture because vaginismus does not just concern sexual intercourse, it also touches on the intrusion of medical tools too. A regular gynecological follow-up is necessary to remain in good health and to prevent possible risks.
  • Discomfort during menstruation: For the reasons mentioned in the previous point, the use of a tampon is also often made impossible. Goodbye freedom of movement, tight-fitting clothes, water activities...
  • Physical suffering: Of course, if the origins of vaginismus are purely psychological, meaning the contraction of the muscles makes any attempt at penetration painful.
  • The feeling of guilt: Women could eventually question themselves and feel guilty about not being able to share a fulfilling sexual life with her partner. And it is often this last point as well as the desire of become a mom which finally pushes the women to go to consult.

The editor’s opinion: Talk about the highs and lows of your sex life

There is no shame in talking about sex and even less about sexual problems. Health professionals are there for that, they know this subject very well and will be able to accompany you discreetly, at your own pace and in confidence to remedy them.
No one deserves to suffer in silence from this disorder. No one should deprive themselves fulfilling love making or even a family life because of it. With the methods mentioned in this article, more than 4 out of 5 women were able to have penetrative sex in just 6 to 7 sessions. The most difficult part of this process is no doubt picking up the phone to book an appointment!

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