No Sex In A Relationship - Could It Make Me And My Partner Happier?

Last updated by Katie M.

What are people in a sexless relationship called? Are they roommates? Or even platonic lovers? For me and for many others; sex is the foundation of any relationship, but being the curious person that I am, finding an answer to this question seemed like a challenge I couldn't turn down. Thinking back to the early days of my relationship, going 3 days with no action between the sheets was virtually impossible, yet, many couples say putting a stop to love making saved them. This got me thinking and after reading more about sexual abstinence, it got me thinking about the benefits of giving the bed springs a break.

No Sex In A Relationship - Could It Make Me And My Partner Happier?
Contents: 

It’s with a heavy heart that I’m writing this. I’m not counting or anything (well, that’s a blatant lie) but let’s just say it’s been a month since I’ve seen any action with my partner. All physical contact is off limits, there's no kissing, cuddling or anything else for that matter. All I can say right now is that it’s definitely an experience! It’s not that we’re no longer attracted to each other, on the contrary, we just wanted to give this a shot and discover the benefits that sexual abstinence could bring to our relationship.

I have no sex drive, and it's ruining my relationship! But, is it really?

Can a relationship survive without making love? That’s the question! As someone that has given a sex ban a try, I can definitely say that the benefits are plentiful. Although the first few days of celibacy are tough, things get easier as time progresses. Many couples have given this a shot, and most of them are in fact completely satisfied with the results.

Sex

If you take love making out of the equation, you’ll definitely find you have way more time on your hands to do as you please. Taking a break for my usual sex life taught me a lot more about my partner and showed me how talented he actually was in other domains far away from the bedroom.

The frustration means the best is yet to come

We all know that routine only ever has a negative impact on our libidos, especially if we are in a long-term relationship. When it comes to love making, the optimists of the world advise keeping things fairly regular and even go as far as suggesting you turn down certain propositions with tact to get the desire running high. Refusing to give in to your body’s urges only means your enjoyment will be intensified the next time round. Building desire and tension is guaranteed to help you relight the fire between you. 

Couple

Trust me, if you follow this advice, you won’t be able to keep your hands off each other for too long!

At the beginning of the article, you can probably see that I was fully embracing my new sexual abstinence life choice, however as time went on, I started missing the intimacy! These insights have led me to my final conclusion.

The experiment is definitely wearing on my patience...

Although the experience taught me a lot about myself and my desires, I can safely say that abstinence definitely makes life less exciting. My moods are often closely related to how satisfied I am in the bedroom, too. Regular love making is said to improve sleep quality too because it helps us relax and zone out. Plus, it’s way more interesting than doing the dishes...

Hug

I almost forgot to mention hugs! Whether brief or drawn out, hugs are the secret to releasing a multitude of endorphins and make us feel so much better. Science never gets it wrong!

What to do if no sex in a relationship is getting you down?

Whilst a sex break can do the world of good for certain couples, that is, when both partners are willing to give the experiment a try, for others, it will tear them apart. If your partner has suddenly gone off love making and this is leaving you frustrated, here are 5 things you can do about it.

  • 1) Ask them for an explanation - Getting to the root of the issue, if there is one, is always a useful first step.
  • 2) Listen - Following on from the first point, this is the only logical sequence to reviving the flame. Plus, perhaps it will bring things up that you hadn’t even considered.
  • 3) Spend more time together - Quality time will increase natural moments of tenderness between you.
  • 4) Be more romantic - Hold hands, kiss, cuddle, and then see where it leads…
  • 5) Respect your partner’s choices - Our libidos are never linear and naturally experiences highs and lows, depending on our moods and stress levels, for example.

Editor's opinion - No sex in a relationship doesn't have to signal the end

We are all different when it comes to our sex drives, there are those that can't go 2 days without stripping off for some hanky-panky, and there are those that flee sex. That being said, not having sex doesn't have to be a death sentence for your relationship, in fact, it can even be an exciting opportunity for you. That's to say, to get to know your partner on a deeper and more emotional level. After all, sex isn't everything, but a pure connection is!

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

These articles might interest you:

Article presented by Katie M.

🌻 Discover the world through my eyes.

Read our latest articles here:

Adjustment Disorder

Life is full of unexpected things. Sometimes we have nice surprises, sometimes we experience traumatic events. The latter can lead to what we call an “adjustment disorder”. I experienced this when my mother died. The shock was so immense that I couldn’t cope anymore. If you feel like you’re going through a very difficult period after a shock, you may also be affected by adjustment disorder. Let’s talk about it.

5 Steps To Overcome Your Fear Of Relationships

Getting involved in a romantic relationship can bring back many painful memories, which may prevent you from experiencing new things in your emotional life. Fear of loving, committing, being abandoned, feeling betrayed, suffering: these are all ideas that can fuel your fears. Here’s our advice on how to overcome this fear of relationships, also known as philophobia. Let me explain.

Orbiting: When Your Ex Watches Your Stories All Day Long

In the dating world, there’s a word for everything. That’s how I came to learn the name of something very unpleasant that happened to me several years ago. I’d been on a few Tinder dates, things were going well, but from one day to the next I’d heard nothing. I wasn’t in love, so it was fine. However, I found it hard to move on, because he couldn’t stop looking at my Instagram stories and following me keenly... It’s called orbiting. Why do this? How do you react to this behavior?

How Do You Live With A Hypersensitive Person?

Crying in front of an advert? Done ✅. Being disturbed by the slightest noise? Of course ✅. Not being able to deal with negative emotions? Sure ✅. All hypersensitive people experience this on a daily basis. At least, I do. Yes, I’m part of team emotions! It’s already difficult for me, so when I’m in a relationship, I know my partner’s lost. So I’ve written a little guide to help people who live with a hypersensitive person on a daily basis.

“My Work Is My Raison d’être”: Beware Of An Imbalance!

I’m one of those people who doesn’t put work at the center of my life. On the other hand, I have a friend who does, to the point where her body gives out regularly. Clearly, her work is her raison d’être and she gives everything. Perhaps a little too much. That’s why I wanted to write this article, to remind her to be careful! Maybe it will help you too, especially if you feel that your career’s taking up all the space in your life.

Strategic Incompetence At Work

“Which folder do I need to put these videos in again? And how does it work to do the videos? Can you help me? I’m really struggling...”. I think we’ve all encountered these words and this kind of situation at work. Sometimes people really are lost, sometimes you get the feeling that they’re lacking motivation and that they just don’t want to do it. And that’s precisely what strategic incompetence is. Why is this a problem? I’ll explain all.

The Toast Theory Or How To Look On The Bright Side

Imagine you’re having breakfast, you’re heating up your tea or coffee, and you get the urge to toast some bread. Everything’s going well, you sit down at the table and butter your toast. Then all of a sudden, clumsily, the toast falls to the floor. Obviously, it falls on the wrong side, the butter side, and picks up all the dust and hairs lying around on the tiles. YUM! But it seems that it’s not all bad that the sandwich falls on this side... Let’s explain!

Am I In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship?

Love is such an unpredictable journey that it gives the perfect cover for emotionally abusive partners to hide behind masks of perfect Mr. Darcy-like characters. Now, let's face it, no devious manipulator enters a relationship by showing their true colors. In the beginning, they make for caring and supportive partners, that is, until they've got you completely hooked. Once they believe you are sufficiently spellbound by them, they'll put their despicable plan of emotional abuse into play, and their victims won't suspect a thing before it's too late. Signs of emotional mistreatment aren't always easy to pick up on, however, these types of partners do have a common modus operandi.

6 Examples Of Moving Farewell Letters, It’s Time To Open Your Heart

"Love stories usually end badly." As you know as well as Les Rita Mitsoukos, love isn’t a direct path to eternity. Sometimes it disappears from our hearts, leaving a great emptiness, if not fierce hatred. That’s when it’s time to say goodbye, and a letter can sometimes be the most effective way of saying exactly how you feel and explaining why you’re leaving. Here are 6 examples of farewell letters, to say goodbye, ciao, or bye-bye to a loved one, but also to a friend or, more sadly, to a loved one who has died.

So What If I Hate Working?

I always thought that I was surrounded by people who loved their jobs, that is until I started openly talking about how much I hate working. Let’s get one thing straight, I’ve never liked my job, but have only recently built up the courage to talk about it. That's right, I used to hide my despair under a huge smile in an effort to convince myself I was overreacting, plus I was also afraid of other people judging me. In fact, daring to share my thoughts got me asking if I was the problem; was I the black sheep? Or, were my reasons for this bold statement justified? It's time to see if are all secretly on the same wavelength.



Wengood's favorite tunes 🎵

Wengood's playlist

wengood

  1. Only LoveBen Howard
    4:08
  2. Invalid date
  3. Fix YouColdplay
    4:55
  4. Beautiful DayU2
    4:08
  5. Thinking out LoudEd Sheeran
    4:41
  6. White FlagDido
    4:00
  7. Lay Me DownSam Smith
    4:13
  8. Nine Million BicyclesKatie Melua
    3:17
  9. Put Your Records OnCorinne Bailey Rae
    3:35
  10. Summertime SadnessLana Del Rey
    4:24
  11. Imagine - Remastered 2010John Lennon
    3:07
  12. Shake It OutFlorence + The Machine
    4:37
  13. Space Oddity - Love You Til Tuesday versionDavid Bowie
    3:46
  14. What A Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong
    2:17
  15. With Or Without YouU2
    4:56
  16. HelloAdele
    4:55
  17. Don't Stop Me NowQueen
    3:29
  18. Skinny LoveBirdy
    3:21
  19. WingsBirdy
    4:12
  20. Californian SoilLondon Grammar
    3:41

How to detect a narcissist

How to detect a narcissist

How to soothe an anxiety attack

How to soothe an anxiety attack