4 Tips For Learning To Love Yourself: Be Kind To Yourself

Last updated by Katie M.

“I’m ugly”, “I’m not good enough”, “I'm not capable of doing anything”, these are thoughts we've all had, it's fair to say at times we can be our own worst critics. That being said, when we don't like ourselves and how we are, it can be difficult to embrace a good sense of self-esteem, which makes the road to appreciating ourselves even rockier. However, this is the key to achieving fulfillment and equilibrium. By learning to love ourselves, we will be able to feel good, both in our bodies and minds.

4 Tips For Learning To Love Yourself: Be Kind To Yourself
Contents:

Learning to love yourself in 4 steps

Cognitive-behavioral therapy might be useful for people who have low self-esteem. However, some simpler tips can be put into practice on a daily basis!

1. Look at yourself kindly

You shouldn’t blame yourself. Don't feel guilty if you didn’t manage to keep a promise or didn’t reach a goal you set yourself. It’s human to make mistakes, and this is how we learn. You should accept your weaknesses and faults, and you definitely ought to go easier on yourself.

2. Don’t give in to pressure

It is extremely important to not always think of the worst-case scenario. You should stop being afraid! When undertaking a new project, take some time out for you to relax and believe in yourself. You’re like everybody else; you have several skills and these will allow you to reach your goals! Being confident in your skill set will allow you to take the pressure off and rediscover your confidence.

3. Don’t let what other people's opinions affect you

When other people look at you, it often causes feelings of insecurity. It’s essential you stop wondering what other people think. Don’t seek approval from others, you and you alone should be appreciative of yourself. By living for yourself, you’ll learn to love yourself again. Accept yourself as you are, both physically and mentally.

4. Think positively 

Say goodbye to negative thinking and hello to positivity. This will then allow you to see the positive side of life and put things into perspective. In order to succeed at thinking positively, you can write about each day in a notebook. For example, you can note down something you are proud of, or even something less significant. As a result, you will notice a lot more positivity in your life than you could ever have imagined!

>>> Discover the power of positive communication in relationships.

How do you know if you don’t love yourself? - Here are the signs

Learning to love yourself is probably the most difficult thing in the world. It's much easier to drown in a life you didn't choose than to look in the mirror and take the time to take stock of who you are, behind the masks you wear in society, sometimes even at home. However, here are some classic signs that you don't love yourself enough:

  • You have a hard time saying no;
  • You don't feel like you belong in your life;
  • You are often depressed, anxious, or angry;
  • You are not satisfied with the relationships around you;
  • You easily accuse others;
  • You expect a lot from others;
  • You mistreat your body;
  • You often feel inadequate;
  • You feel misunderstood;
  • You find it very difficult to make decisions;
  • You don't feel useful.

If you recognize yourself in at least 2 of the above, you will have to accept that building your self-esteem is a necessary one. Recognizing this is the most important part of the challenge, it is also the most difficult.

What happens if I don’t love myself?

Not liking or loving oneself can lead to devastating consequences on several levels. If this scenario plays out, relationships will be complicated and the defense systems put in place are not only ineffective but totally counterproductive. The excessive jealousy of the emotionally dependent person can become unbearable: the other person feels suffocated and suffers in turn from the lack of trust that is shown. But not loving oneself also has repercussions in other areas: the lack of love leads to a lack of esteem, which leads to a lack of confidence. Thus, one can have more difficulties blossoming in the professional environment in which one will have a tendency to reproduce the same patterns: by seeking to please everyone, one can be at the mercy of their coworkers, for example. Plus, by not believing enough in one's values and competences, one can give up opportunities.

Editor’s Opinion – A problem shared is a problem halved

Sometimes we are never good enough; we see ourselves as rubbish and, when this feeling kicks in, it’s as if you can’t do anything about. If, despite all the tips, you struggle to increase your sense of self-esteem, you can contact a therapist… especially if this suffering is really getting you down. If you find it difficult making friends thriving in your work life or even finding love, a psychoanalytical or behavioral therapist might be the answer.

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

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Article presented by Katie M.

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