What Do Guys Think After You Sleep With Them? 10 Thoughts They Have

Last updated by Katie M.

Admit it, whenever you’ve hooked up with a guy, you’ve always caught yourself wondering what he thought after your steamy session? You’ve no doubt been curious as to know what he thought about your body, and even how he rated your performance. With all these questions flying around, I thought it was about time I revealed what men really think after you sleep with them, so with this in mind, let’s plunge deep into the sometimes X-rated thoughts guys have afterward.

What Do Guys Think After You Sleep With Them? 10 Thoughts They Have

Guys are often portrayed as being very nonchalant about their love life, and many of us are undeniably guilty of believing that once they’ve had a good time, they don’t bother to give us a second thought. (Special shoutout and thanks to all those who never called us back despite promising they would…) Well, in fact, men are a total ball of emotions after any sexual encounter and have hundreds of thoughts, ideas, and notions flying around their brains once the fun is over. Now, although some of their insights remain typically ‘laddish’, others are much deeper and hide a state of intense vulnerability.

>>> Discover these 7 tips for a fulfilled sex life.

10 Things guys think after hooking up with a girl

1) Wow, I really enjoyed that!

This is, without doubt, the first thought that guys can muster together following a sequence of epic lovemaking. Yes, that’s right, once we put all the clichés about a man’s ego to the side, especially in regard to sex, we soon realize that they too appreciate healthily naught sexual experiences. The truth is, sex is a big deal for guys too, and they spend as much, if not more, time replaying passionate scenes as women do. After all, we need something to get us through boring Monday morning meetings, right?

2) I wonder whether she enjoyed it?

Popular culture would lead anyone to believe that guys love sex SO, SO much that they are only really bothered about their own pleasure. Well, you’ll be pleased to know that this myth can be fully debunked and is totally false. Hollywood may like to paint men out as Casanova types who look for nothing other than one-night stands, however, for the most part, they do care about a woman’s pleasure and want her to get off too. For them, sex should be a shared activity that gives each partner intense enjoyment, both physically and mentally.

3) Will she want to see me again?

This is the biggest make-or-break question that runs through any man’s mind after he’s spent an amazing night with an equally amazing woman. Many men often worry that asking their date to meet up again soon after spending the night together will make them seem too keen and too full on. So, although many of them would love to blurt out this particular question the minute they are putting their shoes on, lots of them actually stay silent.  Hey, putting themselves out there can be tough and could lead them to a vulnerable place.

>>> Find out why sex is so difficult to talk about.

4) Did she fake it?

No sexually active man on this planet can honestly say that they’ve never wondered if one of their partners faked an orgasm. Now, hear us, women, out on this, many of us are guilty of faking it until we make it, but that’s only because we want our partners to feel good about themselves. Although, the more comfortable women feel with their partners, the more open and honest they become about their needs and desires.

5) When is it acceptable to call her?

‘Should I call her the day after, or should I wait 3 days or even for a week to go by?’ Well, the truth is, there isn’t really a right or wrong answer here. It’s impossible to let the perfect amount of time go by because there’s no secret formula. Rest assured, guys, you can reach out when you want to, and certainly shouldn’t worry about looking desperate or pushy. If feelings are there, then they deserve to be explored.

6) Was she completely honest with me?

This thought or should I say niggling doubt is ever so common after no strings attached sex. Although, the hypothetical problem with so-called no strings attached sex is that we can never truly be certain that our partner isn’t hiding a whole secret life from us. What if they really are attached? Worrying about this is definitely legitimate because it could open an entire can of worms, and well, no one really wants to be the side piece, do they?

7) They wonder if you’ll tell your friends

Guys aren’t naive and know that we all discuss our sex lives with our girlfriends over a few drinks. The thought of their hook-up telling their pals about your sex life often excites them and makes them wonder which juicy details they share. Plus, many guys are eager to know your account of what happened that one fatefully passionate night.

>>> Read up on how narcissists behave sexually.

8) They think about your body

They’ll think about your legs, your thighs, your butt, your boobs, and everything in between. It’s a well-known fact that guys love fantasizing about their partner’s smoking hot body from time to time, and why not? It’s certainly not a crime to lust over every inch of someone’s skin.

9) Could we build an emotional connection?

When a guy feels 100% secure and happy with you, then chances are he’ll want to take things to the next level, meaning he’ll want to work towards a relationship with you. Sex is ultimately more than just a physical thrill, it can also lead to beautiful love stories.

10) Did I finish too fast?

Because no one can be confident 100% of the time… That’s right, just like us girls worry about our cellulite and muffin tops being on show, guys, in turn, get anxious about coming too fast and their orgasm face too, believe it or not!

The psychology behind post-intimacy vulnerability

What many don't realize is that intimate moments create a unique psychological state in men. The release of oxytocin and other bonding hormones actually makes men more emotionally vulnerable than they might typically be. This biological response explains why many men experience deeper emotional reactions than they're willing to admit.

Breaking down masculine stereotypes in modern dating

Society's expectations of male emotional stoicism continue to evolve. While previous generations might have suppressed their post-intimacy feelings, today's men are increasingly comfortable acknowledging their emotional needs. This shift represents a healthier approach to masculine sexuality and emotional expression.

The impact of hookup culture on emotional connection

Modern dating apps and casual encounters have created new emotional challenges. Many men struggle to balance their desire for emotional connection with the perceived pressure to maintain casual attitudes toward intimacy. This internal conflict often leads to complex post-encounter emotions that go unaddressed.

Communication barriers in intimate relationships

Despite wanting to express their feelings, many men still face significant communication hurdles. Cultural conditioning and fear of judgment often prevent them from sharing their true thoughts and emotions after intimate encounters. Understanding these barriers is crucial for both partners to create more honest and fulfilling connections.

Building emotional safety in intimate relationships

Creating an environment where men feel safe expressing their post-intimacy thoughts requires mutual effort. When both partners acknowledge and validate each other's emotional experiences, it leads to deeper connection and more satisfying intimate relationships. This emotional safety becomes the foundation for more authentic expressions of vulnerability.

Editor’s opinion - Let’s forget stereotypes

Men often have a rough time when it comes to feelings, and they are frequently made out to be heartless in matters of sex and relationships. In reality, many of them would love to move away from the hookup culture and move into more stable territory, however, due to societal pressure and bad advice, they feel unable to do so. It’s about time that we stopped mocking their thoughts and doubts and started to respect them.

🤗 Understand yourself, accept yourself, be happy... Let’s do it here and now!

#BornToBeMe

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Katie, M.

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