Narcissists often get bad press, and although many of us try to see the best in most people, in their case, it can be extremely difficult to find. The truth is, folks with this personality disorder don’t exactly have many redeeming qualities that could potentially help to excuse and explain their borderline evil behavior. Plus, when it comes to love, their lack of empathy means they have next to no loyalty, which means many of them often end up cheating on their partners. Ladies, if you are in a relationship with a narcissist, the alarm bells ought to be truly deafening.
Now, I’d never really advocate falling in love with an emotionally abusive vulture, because I firmly believe that narcissists are incapable of enjoying healthy relationships. But, I know that at times we can’t control what we feel, especially when it comes to love, so I want to warn you about the dangers and sources of potential heartbreak caused by loving a narcissist. And, you’ve no doubt probably already guessed it, but, cheating is certainly at the top of my list!
If you’ve read any of my previous articles about narcissists, you’ll know that I have a bad track record of choosing them as romantic partners. Although my experiences seem tragic, they do give me the certitude that faithfulness isn’t one of their fortes. To give you a glimpse into my backstory, my toxic exes demanded I remained faithful, and restricted me from seeing my lifelong male friends, yet, I couldn’t expect the same from them. No, in fact, their frivolous attitudes meant they loved flirting and turning on the charm for anyone who would give them the time of day, and stroke their egos. Their hypocritical behavior was something that made me feel terrible about myself, yet I was so convinced of their love for me that I simply accepted it. In essence, I was brainwashed and didn’t realize that I was putting my mental health at stake with the manipulation and gaslighting I was subjected to. My exes wanted to keep me around as their plaything, but that didn’t stop them texting others girls, sleeping with them either…
>>> Discover the personality types that narcissists target
No, a narcissist typically struggles with being faithful in relationships. Narcissists often have an inflated sense of self-importance and a deep need for admiration, which can lead them to seek validation from multiple sources. Their lack of empathy and tendency to prioritize their own needs over those of others can make it difficult for them to maintain loyalty and commitment to one partner. Additionally, narcissists may engage in manipulative behaviors and have a propensity for deceit, further complicating their ability to be faithful. While individual experiences may vary, the inherent traits of narcissism generally hinder the capacity for fidelity in relationships.
I know that I’m about to shatter the fairy tale for many of you, but bad boys, and in this case narcissists, don’t change, despite how much love and commitment you give them. As little girls, we all dream of running off into the sunset with a rebel who suddenly transforms into Mr Perfect the moment we confess our feelings for each other. Unfortunately, this fantasy couldn’t be any further from the stark reality, especially where toxic personalities are concerned.
As for narcissists, they don’t believe that love exists, and certainly aren’t motivated by the prospect of finding someone they can spend their lives with. Now, I hear you asking, if they don’t want to find a healthy relationship, what do they want? Well, as terrifying as it may seem, these folks are quite happy to be alone, except when they believe someone can benefit them either professionally or financially. These vampire-like personalities will only ever ‘give’ themselves to people who can help them along, on the condition that they are also weak and agreeable, aka, easy to control.
It’s fair to say that narcissists aren’t cut out for relationships and will ultimately always have their heads turned when they are with someone. Their lack of empathy and self-entitlement means they believe they can do and get whatever they want, without a single thought for the people they hurt. These characters are like children in a sense, they are instantly attracted to new and shiny things, well in this case people, which explains why their heads are turned with such ease. A narcissist believes they deserve the best in all realms of life, and won’t hesitate to upgrade their partner if someone better (prettier or more successful) comes along.
Narcissists are very sly characters, plus they are experts when it comes to covering their tracks. Their sneakiness mixed with their frequent gaslighting means that their unfaithfulness can be hard to detect, however, certain signs don’t lie. Here are 5 signs your narcissistic partner is seeing someone else behind your back.
Narcissists can be skilled at lying and manipulating others to get what they want. However, there are some signs that may indicate when a narcissist is lying:
It's important to remember that not all individuals with narcissistic traits are compulsive liars, and not all liars are narcissists. However, if you suspect that someone with narcissistic tendencies is lying to you, it's essential to trust your instincts and proceed with caution.
Editor’s opinion - My ex was a serial cheat, but I managed to leaveEmpaths such as myself just aren’t compatible with guys who have narcissistic personality disorders, because we always find ourselves forgiving the unforgivable. I should know because I’ve been there, done it and even bought the t shirt. It took me months to build up the courage and end things definitively with him, but I’m so glad I eventually did! I’d managed to brush off his incessant flirting with other woman, secret late night phone calls and endless dating apps for years, until one day I decided that I deserved better and left. If you are also in this situation, know that you can and absolutely NEED to do the same! |
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Katie, M.
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